The Unnamed God. I'm really Not a God You Guys!

Chapter 115: This Castle Is the Absolute Worst!

****(POV)

I am pretty much unknown in this world, even on this continent.

Just a simple mercenary in a mercenary company that has more history than future.

After all, we used to be in the Lion's band. We even fought alongside the Eagle of Massacre many times. Well, he wasn't that famous at the time.

As we came here, I already knew something to be wrong with this place.

The whole domain itself was already bad. Somehow, we survived it so far. All following a man I thought to be slightly naïve and incompetent at first. I was truly mistaken about him. I am the taciturn and cautious type that I know. I am that one guy that never says anything while others are exclaiming aloud. But even then, he still convinced me to follow him. From all the feats he accomplished. I don't want to dwell on the past and won't even bother to list it all, but it was truly impressive.

He brought us all the way to the core of this world. We were now facing a majestic-looking castle.

Just the very location of it screamed trouble. There was no way a fief could be randomly built in such a god-forsaken land. I would have truly preferred to steer clear of it, but it couldn't be helped.

We didn't really have any better option. Also, we were still following him. Somehow, I got the feeling things will turn right. I the one that doubts anything, and everything actually trust this man with my life.

We tried to push the doors. Even with all of us combined we couldn't even make it budge. Our leader the only mage in the company seemed at a loss too. That's when he stepped up, yet again.

Spent a few minutes with his eyes closed then extended his hand and …. absolutely nothing happened. At first glance anyway. But then we were ordered to push again. Then it worked.

What he did I have no idea still. He simply resolved the issue.

Then came a gust of air. Somehow it gave me the feeling that we were releasing some sealed ancient evil. Might be my pessimist nature acting up, however. We went deeper and deeper inside going through most of the rooms. We found things one would expect to find in a normal castle. That being a bad thing in my opinion. There is no way a normal castle would have stayed here standing and intact. Not even a small trace of damage to be seen.

It being so empty scared me more than it reassures me. Such an environment usually comes with magic at play. Mercenaries don't mingle well with magic. We are men of the steel. We spill sweat and blood. There are occasional mages that join such a profession but they usually don't stay long. The whole lifestyle of the occupation clashes with their ways of life.

Magic is more about searching for the truths of the world. All about trying to find something new and increase one's control over mana. Warriors are all about building up their muscles and finding more efficient ways to use them. The first one finds strength from the world and the latter creates strength from nothing but building the body. Well, it kinda is like that. For most people anyway.

Our leader is a mage that also trains his body. He's one of the weird ones. He used to be the second in command of the Lion himself at some point. They used to be great friends, but they did have their differences. Mostly about the banditry episode.

But anyway I digress, mercenaries and magic don't mix well. And this whole castle reeks of magic.

My instinct tells me to just leave and run. Where are we even supposed to run to? That I don't know. But I kept following for we have a reliable ally. Then we came across a throne room. In there we found something that should have obviously been dead. The lack of breathing giving it out right away.

Problem is it came to life right after. Well, life would be a mistake as even then it wasn't breathing.

It came to life by being poked in the eye.

I was sure it was going to fly into a rage and end us all right there and then.

Apparently, I was wrong. I feel like I've been wrong on many things lately. Even still I get the feeling I am perfectly sane. I get the feeling that the whole world is the one turning mad. I can't be the only one.

Yes, instead of killing us he brought us to a dining room. He then left us alone to go prepare some stuff. Our leader said aloud what we were all thinking I assume. How we should leave and about our host being an obvious vampire. The hair, the lack of breathing, the eyes, the overall feeling, no way he could be anything else.

The one we are now following denied it. Not sure why. Did he truly not see it? Were we being monitored? Did he know but chose to ignore it for some reasons beyond my understanding? All guesses being possible…well not the first one. That one is quite impossible when you think about it logically.

Only a fool and an idiot wouldn't realize it. He seems not only wise in times, but also extremely powerful. I still don't believe our leader is the one that made that giant flaming sword possible. Also, I get a feeling that this specific sword reminds me of something for some reason.

Anyway, he told us to wait for his signal. That he would tell us using a keyword whether to stay or leave. Guess that also excludes the monitoring option or he wouldn't have told us directly.

Thus I patiently waited for our host to be back. I swore that whatever he brought I wouldn't touch it. He came back shortly after. I thought I had seen it all, but I still got surprised. Horrified in fact.

With him a cart full of delicacies. Was it anything else there I could have just ignored it. Not this. Anything but this! He placed in front of me something that not only seemed heavenly but appeared tasty and overall the best I've ever seen.

My last thought before indulging in the cute cat-shaped cookies was that this castle is the absolute worst.

Even the poison is that appealing!

Fuck that castle! Fuck the cook! Fuck these cookies!

Tears of bliss, joy, and bitterness came out as I kept eating bite after bite.

Knowing I would most probably die from it.

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