My Husband Turned Me To His Maid

After reading the scriptures I started to think that maybe it was God actually speaking to me, but again I doubted if he would speak to me after all my sins. God must have already grown tired of forgiven me.

He must really be tired of hearing me say sorry without me showing true repentance. But I was in doubt now of everything, I didn't know what was and what was not. I didn't know anything for certain. My feelings now wavered like the way Cletus treats me, inconsistently. Today he is the Angel, tomorrow he is the demon and the next day, the next day he is nothing at all.

I hear voices in my head telling me to remain calm, to have faith that Everything will be fine. But how long can I hold on before I loose my mind? Because these voices, these voices are definitely a sign that I was losing my mind to him. To Cletus.

I packed my long brown braids up and wore a hair net. Everything I did l, I did mechanically without feeling. Time passed and I remained still, waiting, hoping, praying.

I have been sitting on the sofa for more than two hours waiting for Cletus to be back from work. The bad thing was that I wasn't even feeling sleepy. My eyes did not feel heavy, although my limbs were weak. I was afraid to close my eyes, the moment my eyelids close they open with the same veracity.

Fear was eating me up and I was letting it, even enjoying it.

Looking at the wall, the time was a minute past 12 in the morning. I became worried for my husband but I was now more angry and furious. How dare him come home by this time! He will have it when he comes. This house will be on fire should he step in. I wouldn't let him go off easily today! Enough is Enough!

I soliloquize angrily.

But then amidst my anger was fear, fear that he would end up hurting me should I dare to speak up to him or trouble him. Then there was doubt, if I would be able to speak up to him when he comes. Anxiety, that he won't even come at all. Hope, that nothing bad has actually happened to him.

I was feeling emotions upon emotions and my heart was sinking so deep. Amidst it all I was at least grateful that my daughter Ezinne was fast asleep. At least there was one thing I was thankful for, my daughter.

"I Dont know why he will come home this late, a married man with a kid is still not here by 12. Lord!." I mumbled to myself. My emotions were starting to get the better of me. I wanted to cry but tears won't even humor me. Instead I wrapped my hands around my body shivering from the cold.

The parlour was always so cold at night because of how spacious it was. I knew the room would be much more cozy but I refused to go back into the room. "He will meet me here, he will surely meet me here!" I hissed angrily.. but inside me, I was shaking in fear.