Awakening (5)

We all exchanged glances at Kirsi’s completely changed appearance. Everyone was trying to understand the situation.

Weeping bitterly over trivial things. Laughing at light jokes. It was the exact opposite of her usual appearance, where she smiled mischievously even with a short kiss.

“…..Well.”

But I nodded my head bitterly.

Yes, you may hate me for ignoring me after begging you to write me a letter.

maybe it’s good

If she hates me and pushes me out of this… I’m lucky. It may be a good thing if you are disappointed with me and gradually move away from me.

It’s not that my heart doesn’t hurt.

When I push them away, it doesn’t mean I hate them.

I still like them

But that’s just what I like as a brother.

Knowing that our hearts were at odds with each other, this was one of the things we had to endure…

why do they love me

Once again, I could only blame the irresponsible man. If they were left as my brothers.

****

Was it because of my stiff reaction or was it because of Kirsi’s sudden action?

Deep emotions didn’t come and go on the table as much as I was worried.

Before I left the academy, there were no tears or desperate screams that came and went every day.

There was nothing but frozen air and careful glances.

Kirsey still didn’t respond. He was looking down at his bowl with an expressionless face.

It wasn’t that he was silent. He blinked his eyes, kept his mind clear, and kept his mouth firmly shut.

“…let’s eat.”

When Grandma spoke, we took the spoons one by one.

Looking at Kirsi, she didn’t seem to care much about eating. Then he slowly grabbed the knife and thought for a while, then cut the food in the bowl into small pieces and put it in his mouth.

Maybe he was contemplating whether to refuse the meal or not.

It was understandable that Kirsi had changed, but it was also awkward and awkward.

It seemed to appear as the distance was widened again.

If it had been normal, I would have appeased her when she was sad, but the pain that heals without any action may leave such a scar.

….no. Thinking back on it, even if he had done it in front of me, he might not have comforted me. Above all, about this matter.

Our meal proceeded quietly.

Grandma didn’t open the door with a little topic to raise the mood. It wasn’t her personality.

When it comes to her personality, like now, when the dinner party passes halfway…

“…so, have you changed your mind?”

…so, I was going to ask directly.

Kirsi didn’t respond, and continued the meal in front of her.

No, I did.

She raised her hand and snapped her fingers.

– Exactly.

Yongin, who was standing behind her, looked up to Liana and approached her.

Kirsi lets out a word as the maid approaches.

“wine.”

“…Kirsi, you’re drunk…”

My words that were meant to say, “You don’t eat,” are cut off. Without responding to my words, as the red wine filled the glass, he took a sip and poured it into his mouth.

A drop of wine that couldn’t get into her mouth ran down her lips.

The grandmother was not shaken by Kirsi’s actions. As if expecting this, Kirsi ignored Asena and looked at him.

“…have you changed your mind?”

“……”

Asena looked at me once. Then, he moved his eyes coldly and shook his head briefly as he looked at his food.

I let out a long sigh into my chest.

Had nothing changed?

“…Asena, I-”

“-I’m not getting married unless it’s my brother.”

Asena spit out her words in the cold atmosphere.

As it is a collection of poems, the concrete words make my heart flutter.

It’s not even a child’s rant.

It was a declaration from an adult who knew everything.

Her eyes touched me.

“…so don’t think about it strangely, brother. The fact that I fell in love with my brother did not mean that marriage was blocked and opportunities for alliances were lost. Without my brother from the beginning, I would not have even thought of getting married.”

“……”

The reason I couldn’t argue that it wasn’t was probably because I knew the contents of the novel. Because she and Kirsey were emotionless villains and no one loved them.

Asena looked at me without saying anything, and put down her knife and fork.

“…to be honest, brother.”

“….What.”

“Oppa knows that we are not a normal sibling relationship.”

“……Yes, there is nothing I can do about it. I am adopted-”

“-no? I am not saying that.”

“……”

“…Oppa still doesn’t feel completely comfortable with me either.”

At her words, I also put down the tableware. Grandma didn’t say anything.

“…what do you mean, Asena?”

“Oppa, you still can’t look straight at my bare skin. You’re still wary of my chest touching my forearm. Sometimes, you treat me like a woman instead of a brother and sister.”

My eyes were trembling.

“…not because I thought of you as a woman, because we weren’t in that kind of relationship in the first place-“

“I was in a relationship like that from the beginning. It took me less than a year to fall in love with my brother. The period of thinking of him as a man is longer than the period of thinking of him as a family.”

“……”

“…so I…I have a harder time accepting it now. The brother who pushes my heart. I can’t stand my brother who leaves me and goes to another woman. I don’t even understand.”

“…does that make sense? The day I was an older brother, it was natural to think of me as a man?”

“……”

I exhale through my nose. And, like Kirsi, he took my glass of wine and drank it.

I control my emotions, and I speak quietly.

“……anyway. We’ve already talked about this. All I wanted to hear was…that you gave up on me. I was talking about going back to normal siblings. There is no compromise. i know like that My heart cannot accept it.”

At that moment, a voice that had been silent for a while joined the conversation.

“never?”

“……”

It was Kirsey. The voice itself was familiar, but the tone was very different. Unflinching, alluring. Even when she was young, she couldn’t even think of it.

Kirsi was turning the wine glass round and round, watching the tears flowing from the glass with narrow eyes.

There was no sign of sadness at all. He just calmed down as if all of this wasn’t fun. Even though I thought it was acting, I wasn’t sure.

…I don’t know why, but her figure like that was taking over the atmosphere.

When I couldn’t answer Kirsi’s changed mood, she closed and opened her eyes and looked at me.

Arriving at the estate, she meets her eyes for the first time.

“Whatever happens?”

she asks again

Why did it change so much because I didn’t reply?

I didn’t want to be upset, but I couldn’t. Inwardly, I was surprised by her change, but I tried my best not to show it.

I am sure with a firm expression on my face.

“……No matter what happens.”

“What if I commit suicide?”

-Ting.

Grandma Misses The Fork

My eyebrows fluttered wildly. Strength enters the jaw, and the body hardens. hair turns white

Just imagining Kirsi’s death made me collapse. just like grandma.

I immediately shook my head.

…that would be bluff. It can only be bluff.

However, it was after he had already lost the time to respond because he was shaken by her threats.

“……”

Seeing my reaction like this, Kirsi nodded.

Then he drank the refilled wine glass and emptied it, and got up from his seat.

“…not at all.”

And then he turned around.

I couldn’t move until she disappeared.

****

With Kirsi leaving, the dinner party was quickly over.

Me, Grandma, and Asena went back to their respective rooms.

Before leaving the restaurant, Asena grabbed my wrist as if she had something to say, but I immediately shook my head at her and tore her hand away.

So I went back to my room.

After that, I was deprived of energy and lay down on the bed. I didn’t have the strength.

‘What if I commit suicide?’

Kirsi’s voice echoes in his head.

I had no choice but to contemplate the situation. What should I do if she points a knife at herself in front of me and says she will die if she doesn’t love me?

….probably will never see Kirsi die.

It can’t be overlooked at all. That was certain.

I couldn’t have imagined that the soft-hearted Kirsi would act like that, but the way she was before and the way she was in the original story kept coming to my mind.

Time went on and on.

The night deepens and there is complete darkness. The moon also disappears.

The thought took so long that my body couldn’t take it anymore and I went to sleep.

-smart….

The sound of knocking raises the consciousness of my toes immersed in the dream world.

– Knock… Knock… Knock.

I woke up with my tired eyes twitching.

Who cares for me in this deep night…

I thought about it for a while, but I quickly got an answer. only twins

I hesitated.

Is it right to open this door?

Maybe it’s better to return it.

I got up out of bed.

He walked slowly to the door and listened to guess who was standing behind him.

‘..Hit.’

A short hiccup sounded.

It was Kirsey. It was clear.

Kirsi who stood up to me and showed anger towards me. She came to me, thinking that she would avoid me for at least a few days and express her displeasure.

-….knock…knock…knock.

‘Open the door…Hold it out…Brother…’

It was a sound I would never have heard if I hadn’t been paying attention.

I finally turned around, scratching my head.

ignoring it is right

– Knock, clink.

At that moment, I felt a shock and a sound that shook the floor.

I remembered Kirsi’s words of suicide again, and I opened the door vigorously.

“Kirsi..!”

She was sitting cross-legged on the floor.

As soon as I opened it, I could smell the strong smell of alcohol.

Broken wine glasses were scattered beside her.

It wasn’t just the alcohol she spilled that smelled.

Kirsey himself had a fruity scent.

She said that she didn’t usually drink, no matter how much I gave her as a joke.

She was just sitting next to me and pouring the drink so that it didn’t empty.

How did she look so drunk? That alone carries a heavy message to me.

“…Hit…ah…my drink…”

She touched the floor and tried to get up.

But even so, he loses his focus and starts to roll forward.

i got her

If I left it to fall, it looked like it was going to get stabbed by a broken wine glass.

She paused for a moment at my hand, and looked up at my face gently.

“……”

She looked at me without a word. Then, he grabbed my hand.

“…..no. Hee hee… go.”

Maybe she’s drunk I couldn’t stay still. If you’re so drunk, you won’t even remember tomorrow.

“…where are you going to come and leave?”

“…..I hate you. I hate you the most in the world.”

As I got drunk, it was as if the figure I was familiar with came out.

After hitting my hand, she tried to get up, putting her hand against the wall. Her feet indifferent towards the broken glass.

Eventually I scooped her up.

Lift her up into a princess hug position.

If you were a little late, your foot would have been seriously injured.

Kirsi looked up at my face again, and this time buried her head in my arms.

I told her like that.

“……Go to sleep.”

She shook her head.

At first, I thought he was just resisting my words.

but she says

“…..look. Brother, you love me.”

Then, he grabbed the back of my neck with a quick, sharp hand that was completely opposite to the slow and clumsy movement I had made earlier.

Then he raises his upper body from my arms and pulls me straight.

She turned her head and pressed her lips to mine.

I tilted my head back, but she followed me up because of her arm holding my neck.

The tongue slipped into my mouth. Her tongue was the first to come in to block it by clenching her teeth.

At this moment, if you force your chin to close her mouth, it will only hurt her tongue.

Before I even respond properly, her tongue devours mine.

It tasted like strong alcohol.

It was only after she finally relaxed her arms and let her go, she fell from me and slumped to the floor.

“Paha…!”

I wiped my mouth and called her.

“…Kirsi…!”

This was the second time. Because of the smell of alcohol, heat rises on his face.

But Kirsey didn’t seem to mind. I must have forgotten what I just did, nodded and said to me.

“…I want to cut it, brother…”

What did you do to get mad at a drunk person? I find this situation ridiculous, so I open and close my mouth repeatedly, eventually relaxing my body.

“…After…yes. go to sleep Sleep quietly.”

I lifted a blanket for her.

I almost fell on the bed as soon as I was drunk.

I was going to cover her with a blanket when she lay down and go out.

– Tuk…

At that moment, something light touched the ground.

I looked back at Kirsey.

She was throwing off her lightly draped clothes.

“Kirsi…!”

I couldn’t even grab the clothes that had already fallen to the floor and put them back on her.

To do that, I have to kneel in front of Kirsi, who is only wearing underwear. Because I have to catch the clothes that flowed like that.

kirsy says

“…wet…so hot…”

Looking down at her clothes, as she said, dark stains were on them. It was late at night, so I couldn’t see it well… but it looked like it was soaked in wine.

I finally put my hand out. I’m leaving this room anyway.

I thought it was a little difficult now to cover the duvet.

I left the rest to Kirsi and turned around.

My heart was beating strangely, and I felt like I couldn’t stay here any longer. grab the doorknob

As I was leaving the room, a quick hand came out from behind my back and knocked on the door in front of me.

-bang!

So the door to the room was closed.

All I could see was the door right in front of my eyes, and the white, thin arms of Kirsi protruding from both sides of my waist and pressing on the door.

“Kirsi, why do you keep doing this?”

I try to turn to look at her,

“-I’m not wearing anything, brother.”

‘ said Kirsi’s clear voice, unlike before.

“…I’m not wearing anything.”

“……”

heart is pounding Eyes lost their way and wandered. My body stiffened and I couldn’t turn. As Asena said, I still couldn’t look at their bare bodies.

As I stopped like that, Kirsi’s arms narrowed.

Her arms wrap around my waist.

Then, behind my back, two soft things touched.

I didn’t even feel the slightly hard underwear that was supporting my breasts.

Her words of nudity didn’t seem like an exaggeration.

He comes to his senses and moves his hand to rip her off.

“……Let’s do it with me. brother.”

At that moment she says

The hug grew stronger. And finally tremble and hiccup.

“……Hey it. I know… I know everything.”

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