The Unnamed God. I'm really Not a God You Guys!

****(POV) 

"Go on, you loser, run away! Next time I see you, I'll take your other limbs! Useless piece of shit! I'll wreck you whenever, HAHAHA." 

Ah, actually, he's already gone. Guess I can stop the trash-talk. I heard it is customary amongst humans to insult fleeing enemies. 

Even by my standards, he's pretty fast. I could probably catch up, but it would take a while. I won't even bother. I have important business to attend to instead. 

I slowly trot back into the big library. On my way, I snort at the now trembling guards. These humans are so annoying. I always try to enter politely, but it always ends up with me tearing a few limbs off (at least). 

This discrimination is really bad. They let other humans enter without an issue all the time, but not unicorns! It's ridiculous, especially that most places don't even have a human-only policy written. 

That's incredibly dumb of me, but they keep making enemies out of me. Some say something about protecting their territory. Some want to try and domesticate a unicorn. Some even try to straight-up kill me even!

If anything, things ended pretty peacefully here. I just took down a wall and maimed a few of the guards. In previous cities, I sometimes had to kill all of the guards to be left alone finally.

Then, they would complain about not having guards anymore. Please! They should have thought of that beforehand! 

Sometimes humanity just makes awful decisions, really. Before entering, I glance one last time at the guards. 

"The first dumbass that disturbs me will die!" 

I read that phrase in a book. It's really simple but effective. Hopefully, I'll finally have some peace!

Besides the now destroyed front door, everything is in order. I can't be blamed for that one! The entrance was just built too small: that's a design issue! 

Let me see, there is a servant and some guy that has his eyes closed. He's the one that asked us to fight outside. He's probably the one in charge of this place. Time for an interrogation! 

"Hello there, I'm looking for what you humans would call forbidden knowledge!" 

He slowly opens his eyes but then jumps, startled. 

"It's you!"

"?!?" 

Do we know each other? Sometimes I forget human faces. It's not that I can't differentiate facial features, but I just don't really pay attention to them in the first place. He gives a wry smile. 

"I'm that one librarian from before. You asked me for romance books." 

"Ah! I remember now! Wait, wasn't I disguised as a donkey back then?!" 

I can't help but look suspiciously at him. Did this mean he had pierced my wonderful disguise back then? That's impossible?! 

"Eh, donkeys don't usually read by themselves, so I kinda guessed."

Oh! that explains a lot!. I wonder if others have realized that I wasn't just a normal donkey. Probably not, right? This human seems smart. Perhaps he can give advice. 

"Human! Here is the situation. I need a way to defeat Wolfie! How should I go about that?" 

He seems stunned. 

"Who's Wolfie? Why do you need to defeat her? How am supposed to help?" 

"She's the white wolf that follows master everywhere. I need to defeat her to Climb the ranks of the Eternal Forest Kingdom! I need powerful secret techniques to raise my master's affection toward me. This way, I will soon be the number 1 subordinate!" 

He seems at a loss. Is this clear enough? Did I forget any key information? He suddenly asks me again. 

"Wait, so what have you been doing all along?" 

I can't help but sigh. 

"Looking for knowledge to win his heart! I have been to so many sects, and yet none of them had what I am looking for. It's always Human x Human information or Horse X Human Girl. It's never Unicorn X Human, weird, right?!" 

His face changes. He looks concerned about something. 

"How many sects did you 'visit' exactly?" 

"Eh, I'm not sure? Too many to count on one's hooves." 

"….." 

"Or as a human would say: too many to count on one's fingers." 

"…."

"Say something!" 

"I'm pretty sure you've been wasting your time. Well, it's probably not too late."

"What?! How come?!" 

I can't help but panic. If he's right, then this is disastrous! I've been working so hard too! It was harsh going from sect to sect. After all, human maps are so confusing! 

"I Have a suggestion. Why don't we try to find your master? The best way to raise affection is time, you know. You just want to spend time with one another and enjoy life together." 

"Seriously?! It's that easy?! surely there is more to it, right?!" 

"Well, yes and no. Life itself is both incredibly simple and complex. Also, it's doubtful if your master is even in the Earth realm." 

"What?! Did he go back to the god realm?! t's fine. I can wait patiently." 

That's when he shows a suspicious expression.

"What do you mean, back to the god realm?!"

"That's where the Greenwood Lord kept going every time he had to work, long ago. It should be the same for him, right? He's his successor, after all." 

"He's the successor to a god?! What the Hell?! How can you deliver such info with such a straight face?!" HE begins shouting. Wait, was that not common knowledge?! Then he keeps going. 

"I'm just going to ignore that last part. Actually, if you want, I can find you a few books to help you understand human relationships better." 

"That'd be amazing!" 

I can't help but be happy about this outcome. Before long, he comes back with a thick book with the title <How to make friends>. 

"Wait, does this apply to masters too?"

"Yep, you can use the basic techniques in there for sure."

"HAHAHA, with this, I will be unstoppable! Just you wait, Wolfie! Our battle shall be legendary! With this, I will have unlimited power! MUAHAHAHA!"

He looks at me strangely. It cannot be helped. Master once told me that one should laugh when one is happy. 

"Aright, let us go find master right now! This is another chapter for The Unnamed God Sect!" 

Thus begins a new journey!