The Unnamed God. I'm really Not a God You Guys!

Wait, my friends are coming this way? But why are they angry? 

The only recent thing that happened to my knowledge is the Water Pledge. I'm sure this isn't the issue. After all the vows were really straightforward and things I would do either way. Don't tell me they both had a fight and are looking for a mediator? 

That would actually be very likely. Especially if one pestered the other about getting rid of her clothes once more. Actually, It could be her pestering him to put his clothes back in public. Or perhaps it's something entirely unrelated. 

The Water Empress can be seen nearby fidgeting. 

[What's up?] 

"To convince the Water Princess to come all the way here of her own volition it must be serious! The last time, she scolded me for a few days straight. I just hope I didn't do anything wrong." 

[Everything should be fine.] 

I reassure her but I can hear the Water Queen and the Water Monarch chuckling lowly. I feel like they know something. That is when an idea starts blossoming in my mind. What if the issue was with the ritual? 

Yes, I now clearly realize the issue! I was foolish, truly so. We began the show without waiting for them! Of course, they would be pissed. This place doesn't have events diffused live on tv with the possibility to rewatch it all later on. 

I can't believe I screwed up so much! She was probably excitingly awaiting this historical moment and we just had to do it while she went to rest. As for the Naked Emperor, I feel his motivations are probably slightly different. 

You know how there will often be excited girls showing their boobs at football games? One can also see many men bare-chested. Now relate this to this world devoid of entertainment. Since it barely ever happens people are going to be even more excited. Even now they are still weirdly cackling. 

For him, this is probably a gold mine of untapped potential. With such an event he has a slight chance to convince some to undress. Then if he manages to convince them once the second will be way easier. 

Then once he has a solid group, recruiting should be easier. When you have one nudist it's a fucking weirdo for sure. But when you have an entire nudist community it becomes a fun social activity. 

I'm betting this is totally his angle! I instantly relax upon figuring it all out. It's all fine! I have a plan! It is called a reenactment ceremony. Actually, couldn't we turn this into a show?! We could do it on a regular basis. 

City of Water: Come to visit Aqua, remain for the people, and brag everywhere about the amazing pledge ceremony you saw! Oh, and the fortune pies! This may be a bit too long for a slogan but it's a work in progress. With such a plan we will soon be rolling in money. 

We can change the swirling amazing water into even cooler stuff. Goldfish, tuna, serpent, dragon, anything really. Actually, we could charge extra to have people decide what the water shape will be like! 

Oh my god! We could even make it become a destination for lovers. Want to propose to a woman but you are afraid she'll reject you? How about investing in the Confession Water Pledge show?! Not only is it a wonderful gesture but there are tons of strangers to peer pressure her into accepting too. The number of shills is negotiable! They'll scream the loudest to try and convince her to say yes! ????

Why would we go out of our way to plunder some funds if we can get people to willingly offer it to us?! The awesome part is that tourism mostly takes human effort (tour guides) and some investment to assure the safety of it all. 

That is when my reverie gets interrupted by a shout. Then I see the Water Princess and the Naked Emperor make their way through the crowd while pushing people. They soon arrive by the lakeside. 

"Are you alright?!" 

I turn in their direction. 

[Hey guys! Sorry not to have waited for you to start the pledge. Ah, but don't worry I've gotten a wonderful idea! We can simply do a reenactment, one that will be even more glorious and amazing than the last!] 

She looks at me carefully in worry, but then suddenly her eyes focus on the blue glowing mark. Her entire visage becomes white, her eyes open in stupefaction, but then she gives a sad sigh. I can hear her complained aloud. 

"It's too late, far too late. I can't believe this." She gives me a sad smile and she doesn't seem angry with me in any case. Then she focuses on the Water Monarch. She furrows her brows, her gaze hardens and all her face contorts in a mask of fury. That is when she shouts: YOU bitch! I'll make you pay dearly!" 

Then she dashes forward. That is when begins a fast-paced fight. The Water Princess is creating enormous water serpents that strike like whips toward her enemy. However said target keeps her calm, invoking water walls to block it all perfectly.

"I won't forgive you!" (Princess) Yep, she's pissed!

"It's too late already. There is no forgiving or not. Just accept it, fighting is pointless. Don't make me turn against a fellow sect member. You are better than this." (Monarch) Somehow her tone sounds patronizing. 

Seriously, why is this happening?! On one hand, two ladies are fighting over me, I think... But I'd like to know why! Plus, both are allies. 

[Ladies calm down! There is absolutely no need to fight! We are all friends here!] 

Somehow this seems to have fueled the flames of hatred for my pink-haired friend. Meanwhile, all the others in the back start laughing. All except the Water Empress that goes. "Can anyone explain to me where the joke is?!" 

That is when the Naked emperor makes it to my side, but then suddenly appears a barrage of huge water bullets pushing him away. He too is looking at me with profound sadness and at the other with pure hate. The one fighting him is the Water Queen. 

[Hey, Queen! What are you doing?!] 

She smiles at me slightly. "Nothing much, just getting rid of a pest." 

[He may be a pest but he's a friendly one! Stop right this instant!] 

The empress is even backing me. "Yes, you guys! Stop acting weirdly and explain everything already! Wait, what is that?!" 

That is when I see the Water Fairy. Somehow her hand seems to be controlling a water prison of some kind, one enveloping the Empress completely. A few seconds later the prisoner stops moving apparently frozen. The captor softly murmurs.

"Sleep well, I'll explain everything to you when you wake up Empress." 

[At least someone please fucking explain to me what is happening! Why is there a civil war all of the sudden?!]