The Unnamed God. I'm really Not a God You Guys!

I'm just running minding my business. That's when something collides with me out of nowhere! What the hell is that?! 

Wait, no!!!!

[Noooo!!!! My map!!!!] 

The map is gone, my clothes are gone. Ah, both necklaces are still there at least! What about the gear? It's fine too! The mana core is destroyed, however! Fuck! 

What am I supposed to do now? Also, what was that? 

The ground affected is all melted. This is insane! Acid?! 

There is some old guy there. Looks really in shape. Dark hair and eyes. He's looking at me baffled. 

[You! Why did you do that?!] 

"I-it was a mistake, how are you fine anyway?!" 

[You think saying it was a mistake will cut it?!] 

I dash toward him, and I start beating him up! 

*SLAP* *PUNCH*

It seems that he is questioning life right now. But I'm the victim!

[You destroyed my map you asshole! My mana core too! How are you going to take responsibility for that?! Eh!] 

"P-please stop I…!"

He looks extremely aggrieved. 

*PUNCH* *SLAP*

[Talk! Why did you attack me?!] 

"Please stop! I swear I wasn't aiming at you! Someone tried to kill me and I was just defending myself!"

I look around but there is no one else to be seen. 

[You liar!] 

*Sounds of a solid beating* 

"I swear! He just ran while you were attacking me! He's the one I threw acid at!"

[That sounds like you were the attacker, you bastard! Give me a reason why I shouldn't kill you! I lost the map to go back home! I lost my way to feed mana to my artifact too!] 

"Wait! I can help! I'm a mage! I have mana!"

I put him down. Then I hand him the golden gear. 

[Drive mana in that!] 

Before long it starts glowing. 

"Now what?"

[Now we run in the direction it points. No slacking!]

He nods and starts jogging. After a few hours, he's already about to fall. 

"Please! Have mercy! No more!"

[How are you so weak?! Can't you use magic to boost your speed?!] 

"No! *Huff* I'm an acid mage! *Huff* We are better at attack magic than anything." 

[Talk about useless. Your magic is only good to destroy items too. How weak!]

"No! You're the one that's insane! I'm strong! I swear! I'm the leader of a very powerful sect!" 

[Sure you are, and I'm a god. Try a better lie. Now focus on the mana, let's go.] 

I simply grab him and run.

"Wait no! My body is dangerous to handle and…"

Then he stops talking suddenly. He probably has realized that I wasn't going to believe his bullshit. We keep going. From time to time we encounter villages. 

There is usually a kid going: Mommy, why is that naked man carrying an old man in a princess carry! 

Then the mom usually starts screaming that we are deviants, shameless, and should be killed. 

It is at that moment that my companion proposes to throw acid balls at them. I simply slap the shit out of him. Why the hell would I want balls that removes clothing thrown at random villagers?! 

It should be used against sexy female enemies to bring them shame! Best if the target is a demon lord for self-justification. Duh! 

Now I could have easily told him to give me his clothes but that'd be even worse. I could have also stolen one set…and I did. Turns out he was serious about his body being acidic …somehow. Just holding him is enough to melt clothes. 

[How are your clothes even fine?!] 

"Ah, it's a long story…"

[Are you saying you have something better to do? Inserting mana in that thing isn't that hard, right?] 

"True. You see I joined a sect. One that's called Acidic Fun Times. Ever heard of it?"

[Nope. It sounds like a small fun group.]

"Small…. fun…. group…eh, sure. Anyway, we all worship Akresh the Melter. You've at least heard of him, right?!" 

[Nope, doesn't ring a bell. Anyway, this Akresh dude, what's he like?] 

"*Choke* A-akresh dude?! Eh, his slogan is if it's too complicated just melt it away." 

[I see, what's his stance about the other sects?] 

"Uh, people that get in our way should be annihilated and others should be ignored." 

[What about allies?] 

"We pretty much don't have any."

[How come?] 

"Because our abilities make us literally corrosive. The stronger we are the more corrosive we become."

[Gotcha, so you are like what? Rank 2? Yeah, probably since you can just melt paper and clothes.]

"That…." 

[Oh, I'm not looking down on you. Don't worry.]

"S-sure…"

At first, I was really pissed at the guy, but he's not that bad.

Well, he gotta get rid of that tendency to want to try to launch acid balls at people for every little thing. Especially when the target is an old lady insulting us! 

Like sure, he's old. He doesn't mind removing all the clothes of an old lady. But I care! I don't want to see any saggy tits just hanging so low it touches the ground! 

Oh well, I can't really blame him for that. It seems to be their teachings that are problematic.

[Promise me something. In the future stop trying to use acid to solve every problem, alright?] 

"…Alright!"

[Good, one should abide by a code of conduct. It is what makes us humans and not beasts you know.] 

He nods listening seemingly confused. 

"But I can still use strong acid against the worst enemies, right?"

[No! Against the really despicable ones you should never use strong acid!]

"W-why?"

[If they are truly the hypothetical worst, then you gotta make them pay. Strong acid would be too lenient. No, you restrain them and then you use medium potency acid. One that burns the skin and the flesh but only at surface level. Then you let them enough time to recover, making sure their lives are never truly at risk. Then you…] 

He's trembling in my arms. 

"Y-you! What kind of evil sect does …never mind! I mean what kind of amazing sect are you in?"

[Me? The Unnamed God Sect, we are pretty friendly haha.] 

"D-do you often torture people?"

[Never did haha.]

He relaxes.

[Ah, except if you count inducing an orgy at an Untainted Sect branch and making them lose their power. Ah, there was also that dick-less asshole guy I gave tons of aphrodisiac, not sure what happened to him…] 

"How about we sign an alliance! Acidic Fun Times won't ever attack your sect!"

[*Scoff* As if you could make that kind of decision.] 

"I can, I totally can! I…know the sect master!"

[Is he your dad or something?] 

"Something like that!"

[Eh, sure whatever. Now keep pouring mana in there. It's not glowing anymore.] 

"Yes, Boss!"

What's with that guy? Anyway, hopefully, we'll arrive soon.