The Unnamed God. I'm really Not a God You Guys!

I drag myself out of the earth. The field is dead. They are all dead. This was pointless. Completely senseless. 

I start walking. I just want to get out of here. There isn't anyone to bury either. All remains are gone. This is bullshit. 

This world is crazy. This world is dark.

*Puzzled whine.* 

[I don't know Wolfie. I don't know. Let's just walk.] 

What should I have done differently? 

I shouldn't have trusted them. No one should be trusted here. I'd want to say I have my sect, but it is as fake as I am. 

I do not fit here. That goddess should have sent me back home. 

I wanna go home. I don't even know where that is. Do I even have one? Who knows. 

I should tell everyone I know to stay away from me. 

I bring disaster. For all I know, people at the Moon Keep are mad at Luna and the warden for helping me.

The first elder abandoned me. I brought Zero on the wrong path. He's not training in a disaster zone. This is no place for kids. 

I almost killed us all on the road. Little Bai went into a coma because of me. I couldn't even protect a single bakery and I got chased across town for no reason. I met these kind people and they are gone. 

I still have Wolfie, but what if something happens to her? She's smart. She'd probably understand. But I am selfish. A few times I glance at her about to say something. In the end, I cannot muster the courage. It may bite me in the ass later, but I don't want her to leave me too.

Haha, I must have the most pitiful appearance right now. My clothes are gone, again. I'm full of soil. I don't have anything to my name. Ah, weird. I actually still have the necklace the Bald Eagle gave me. I was sure I had lost it? 

I guess he too is on my side. Sometimes I wonder how it would have all went if I had talent. Would my path have changed in the god realm? At the Moon Keep? I don't know.

I'm in a perpetual cycle of self-blame, despair, and self-questioning. I realize how trashy I am. 

Over and over. I feel like I've been walking for a while now. Whatever. 

Wolfie is trying to wake me from my thoughts. It's nice that she's trying to help, but I just don't have the strength. 

"You! Who are you! How did you manage to pass through the barrier?!"

What? Ah, there is an old man.

"Speak! Are you mute?!"

Seems I'm in some kind of village. Oh well, I've been walking aimlessly. I'm just surprised I didn't encounter one before.

[I'm just passing through, don't mind me.] 

"Just passing…You! Your very presence shows that there is something very wrong!"

[*Sigh* Yes, there are many things wrong. This world, me, the gods, the sects, lots of things.] 

"I'm talking about a real danger here!" 

[I see.] 

"Show me where you came from!"

[I see.]

"Are you listening you bastard!?"

[I see.] 

"Hey answer me!"

*Shake*

Why is she shaking me now?

[Ah, whatever. I guess Wolfie can guide us.] 

"The wolf?" 

He seems suspicious. She's a smart girl. The absolute smartest. She shows the way somehow dragging me at the same time. 

Before long we arrive in front of a weird barrier. It is a deep blue and seems intangible. It actually forms a big dome englobing us all. Except that in a spot there is a big gash. The barrier is fragmented there. 

It also seems to be deteriorating. Slowly but surely. 

"This is the end. The end of this continent. We are doomed! Quick we need to…"

He keeps going on but honestly, I don't care. At all. He seems to be saying something to me. I don't even register what it is. 

[I don't know. I'm so very tired. I just want to crash and never wake up.]

*Whimper* 

[Ah, I just want to sleep forever then. Resting with you. Is that better?] 

She nods. 

"*Sigh* Follow me. I'll get you a place to stay for the night."

Not that I understood. I was just about to lie down right here but I'll follow, if only for Wolfie's sake. Cause honestly I couldn't care less. 

He brings us to a small house. There are people looking at us but I ignore them. I don't care about any of them. 

An old lady welcomes us. When she sees me, she screams. Then she repeats over and over that life is precious. That one shouldn't end it so easily. Something about recognizing the look in my eyes. 

I know it is! She should tell that to the goddamn gods! Life IS precious fucking bastards!

Ah, whatever. She brings us to a small storage room, handing us a blanket. 

I'm done for now. I just want to sleep. To forget it all. But I keep seeing it. 

Their face. The fruits. The grins of these devils. They were eating my friends back then. Some were laughing. Some didn't care. My fucking friends! These monsters died too easy a death. 

I just want it to stop! I just want my memory of this to be over! 

I don't want to deal with it! 

That's when I feel something warm. Wolfie cuddling with me. 

Everything will be okay. Not now but someday. I'll deal with it later. Thus I fall into a deep slumber. 

****(POV)

He blames himself but he couldn't have known. Even my divination failed to pick it up. The will of the gods cannot be peered into after all. This tragedy could have been avoided if we knew the goddess better. She was supposed to be kind. She was a monster in disguise. 

What are we to do against the gods themselves?! This reminds me of the Greenwood Lord. He used to be naïve, similar to my current master. But then he was betrayed. Just like our current situation.

Then he changed. I knew he never was the same then. I won't have my king become the same shell of himself. No matter what! 

I will be with him, always! Whoever tries to separate us shall be annihilated. 

Tomorrow I'll try to get him to slowly explore this place. I'll try to cheer him up. This village is not ordinary at all. After all the barrier he broke while absent-minded is one too strong for even the current me. 

What are its secrets?