The Unnamed God. I'm really Not a God You Guys!

Time to start my master plan. 

First thing first, ask a bystander! 

They point me toward the third nearest bakery. 

The guy I ask is really confused about my motives. 

Alright, showtime. 

Back straight. 

Confident attitude. 

Slight smile.

This time I got this. 

Inside is some guy. 

Obviously, the owner here. 

[Hey there! I would like to apply for employment. Ah, but I only sell my skills, not my body!]

He looks at me weirdly. 

"Brother, this place isn't mine. I just man the counter."

Seems I was wrong. 

[I see. When can I see the owner then?]

"Sorry, but we aren't recruiting. You can try some other place in town."

Direct rejection. 

Well, it can't be helped if they are already fully staff. 

Not a problem on my side. 

Guess I'll just …

Comes a cute girl.

"Brother, I am looking for a job. Can you help me?" 

Ah, nice try but they don't need any…

"Sure! We were missing some personnel! Your arrival must be fate! Alright, come behind the counter I will show you your tasks!" 

Brother...

No, this guy doesn't deserve such a title. 

[You literally just said that…]

"Shoo! We need hardworking and polite employees! You are too rude!"

That asshole. 

It's totally because I don't have boobs!

This is discrimination! 

Can I beat him up? 

Ah, whatever. 

He's not worth it. 

As I leave, I can hear him badmouth me. 

She's even praising him for his valiance in turning me away. 

Fuck. 

Screw these guys! 

They were made for each other! 

Bastard and Bitch! 

Okay.

Now to try this again. 

I find another target. 

Right, how am I finding so many bakeries?

Well, the city is big. Really big. 

I enter. 

This time for sure. 

Oh, it's a lady at the counter! 

I can totally use my charm! 

Nice!

[Hey there, are you hiring by any chance? I have months of experience as a cook!] 

She glances at me. 

"I could use a hand for sure. The starting salary wouldn't be that high but if we manage to do well I could increase it in kind." 

Nice! Finally, one that is serious! 

I was wondering if I was cursed or something. 

All is good now. 

[Perfect! Should I show you my skills?] 

"Of course, now if you can just …"

*Sound of a door* 

Comes a dashing young man. 

"Hey there! Are you recruiting? I am looking for a job!" 

Oh? 

Competition, is it? 

I was here first, but truthfully, in such a case the better candidate is the one that will be chosen. 

This will obviously end up into a cook-off. 

This is going to be epic. 

Whatever he bakes will not stand a chance against my pies! 

This is a given for sure. 

"You want to work here too?" 

[I just applied for a job brother haha. I guess we will have to determine who deserves the job the old-fashioned way. May the most skillful one win!]

"Ah, I understand!"

The lady interrupts. 

"No need, he has the job." 

What?! 

She's pointing to the newcomer. 

[Why?!] 

"He is way cuter. Plus looking at you I get the feeling you spent the night on the street. He's obviously the better alternative."

What the fuck?! 

What happened to one shouldn't judge a book by its cover?!

Now he's smiling bashfully. 

Fuck this place! 

Are all the damn cooks so narrow-minded?! 

I'm out!

*Sigh* 

How is getting a job turning out to be so hard? 

It's not even a matter of being competent. 

Alright, I will try one last time. 

The third time's the charm as they say. 

I enter a small shop. 

At this point having a smile on my face is hard. 

[Hey there, are you recruiting? I'm a cook looking for a job.] 

There stands a man with a chef hat. 

This already seems more professional than the previous ones. 

He has his branding straight. 

"Alright, I don't mind putting you to the test."

[You mean to say you won't judge me based on my face, my sexual orientation, my gender, or downright turn me down for no reason?!]

"Why would I?"

[Ah, sorry, it's been a long day.]

He nods understandingly and points me to the kitchen. 

I get to work. 

Baking the most wonderful pie of all time. 

Once it is done, he carefully tastes it. 

[How is it?] 

Time for the verdict. 

This will determine my future. 

"Pretty good. What else do you know how to bake?"

Truth or deception? 

[That is the only thing I currently have mastered, but I can learn easily!] 

"I understand. Alright, we are done here."

[Y-you mean I failed?] 

"Ah, no you got the job kid. As long as you show motivation and the will to improve everything will be fine."

[Nice!] 

I almost hug him in joy. 

Finally. 

It took some time, but I finally did it. 

"Alright follow me, kid." 

We go into an adjacent room. 

It looks like a small prayer room. 

"You are in luck kid. This right here is the secret to my craft. You see the statue in the middle?"

[Yes?] 

"This is a representation of our god KooKing himself!"

I'm not sure I like where this is going. 

"Now kneel in front of it and ask him from the bottom of your heart for his blessing." 

[What happens if I already am following a god?]

Will he flip and become angry? 

"No need to worry. Our God welcomes all cooks into his following. Just forget about that other God."

[Sure…]

How do I do this? 

I kneel and then I pray. 

A true god should be able to hear my true thoughts, rights? 

Perhaps the overall feeling? 

Please god of KooKing.

Please grant me your power! 

I do not care about gods at all.

But I swear that should you bless me I will build a small shrine to you once I have conquered the world through the way of the pies. 

I may never revere you as a god per se, but I will make sure to honor you and consider you a worthy business partner! 

Did it work? 

I glance at the statue, no reaction whatsoever. 

I don't feel any different either. 

"*Sigh* You are not sincere enough in your prayer. Alright, let's call it a day. You can come back whenever to try again. It's all about having the right mentality. You'll get it eventually." 

[Wait, can't one cook without a blessing?] 

"Cook? No, not in the truest sense. You would always remain an amateur never reaching the peak." 

That's how I am forced to leave. 

How am I supposed to believe in some guy I have never even met? 

*Sigh* What now?