The Unnamed God. I'm really Not a God You Guys!

"*Sigh* Whatever I guess just come in and I'll teach you about some of the most important stuff in beast taming."

Nice! I sit on one of the chairs. This teacher of mine only has 2. What happens if a group visits him? Does only one guy get to sit? Would it be determined by seniority of whoever is the strongest one? So many questions.

"Alright what do you think one should do to tame a beast in the wild?"

[Barbecue, obviously.]

"How would barbecue help?"

[Beasts love barbecue. Actually, everyone loves barbecue! Well maybe except for vegans. Even then there are many meatless options.]

"What are you even going on about? What are vegans?"

[People that don't eat meat.]

"You mean poor people? True meat can be expensive."

Yeah, he misunderstood that one. Seriously I do respect the commitment to not consuming any animal. However, I have come to terms with my inner darkness. I wonder if eating meat qualifies me for the evil protagonist tag? Who knows?

[So I was right?]

"For many yes, but that's why you need to research appropriately. Some species might find the smell of food itself DISGUSTING. Some others will go crazy once they smell a smidgen of blood. Some simply won't care either. If you try to bait an elemental with food, you'll simply end up dead."

[Gotcha, that's understandable.]

Would I even want an elemental as a pet? There is a big con there. They are not going to be cuddly and soft. Legit petting my current companions is amazing. A pro would be no need to feed them. Still, if the pets know how to hunt it isn't that bad.

Right thinking about hunting I wonder if it's the mana in the air, but a lack of prey never seems to be an issue. Monsters are appearing left and right like there is no tomorrow. That remains true no matter the number that gets killed. This is good news. How many species disappeared on earth due to overhunting or overfishing? The answer would be too damn many.

Because of that huge population of monsters, I'm not worried about food too much.

"Most of the time taming involves lots of spending to get the materials needed to convince a monster to serve you. Because of the steep cost, a tamer tries to be as efficient as possible."

[Makes sense.]

"There is also a need once baited to make it obedient. This can be done via many methods. No matter how you do it you need to inspire respect. You need to somehow convince your target that you deserve to be followed."

[So beat it up will it submit? Gotcha.]

"Were you not listening?! I said to inspire respect! Not use violence! Aren't you the one that said you like avoiding fights?!"

[That, yes.]

I know for a fact that beast-pummeling taming technique is a thing. I'll have to figure out how to reproduce it but one of my idols used it for so many chaps and it never failed him. It was a fictive character? I don't give a fuck. So are monsters and they are all over the place!

"It is important that you do not make it hate you no matter what. The closer you are with the target the more power it will exhibit once tamed. For instance, it is possible to share your senses to increase both of your awareness. It is also possible to fuse with it directly in the case of elemental beings.

[That's awesome!]

Share senses eh. So kinda like giving telepathic orders for what move to use? Or perhaps being able to see through the eyes of your pet? Would be awesome to get a flying one for the amazing experience.

Also, did he say fusing? Is that a motherfucking transformation scene?!

[Wait, so can one become half-monster for a little while? How does this all work?]

"Should I simply show you? After all, as they say seeing is…"

[Seeing is believing! For sure!]

"seeing is quite faster."

That is …. boring man.

He looks at me extremely seriously. So serious I'm almost expecting him to say something that will be completely plot-defining.

"I'll only do it once."

I'm really not sure what to expect.

Is it me or is the air getting chilly all of a sudden?

No, it's not me! The air is literally getting frozen. I guess it's more the vapor in the air. There is a white mist coming out of him now.

His eyes change color and turn ice blue. One so vivid and piercing. His gaze turns emotionless.

His hair changes color to white. It is also starting to flail all around. What is this a shampoo commercial?!

Some blueish light appears around his arms and hands. It quickly forms into gauntlets and huge ice claws. These look sharp enough to slice anything.

He looks at me in the most impassible way possible.

I get the feeling that his current mood is will kill anyone without showing a single trace of emotion.

You know the psycho killer sociopath kind.

I'm glad I don't have to fight him right now.

"This is how it looks like. The more powerful you are the longer you can keep the transformation going. This also requires perfect synchronization with your tamed creature. Otherwise, you are more likely to both end up injured, quite possibly dead."

Damn this is harsh. I was thinking of trying that but think I'll refrain after all. I quite like being alive.

Also what kind of abomination would become if I fused with Wolfie? Some kind of werewolf? What about the unicorn? Would I become some op humanoid unicorn healer? Oh, wait this is only possible with elementals anyway.

"You need to understand everything there is to know about the mental state required beforehand. Otherwise, disaster will happen. In my case ice is cold. Ice has no emotion, ice simply is. Ice does not care how many creatures die because of it. It is ruthless and cold-hearted. That is how I got my nickname."

[Eternal Ice?]

"I also get called something else too. Care to guess?"

[The coolest dream husband? You know cool as in chill….]

He doesn't seem amused. At all.

I won't get murdered for a bad pun today, right?!