Stunned for You

At 8:30 on Saturday morning, Shi Yi woke up to the sound of crackling rain. Outside the window, the wind and rain are gloomy, and the heavy rain is rushing. Everything in the world seems to have not fully awakened from the night.

Shi Yi only slept for three hours, and was suddenly awakened with a severe dizziness. She rubbed her eyebrows, got out of bed, and closed the open windows for ventilation.

Turning around, lifting the quilt, the rabbit sleeping in the quilt fell into his eyes, Shi Yi's movements suddenly stopped, and his sleepiness disappeared.

The sky was gloomy, and my mood didn't brighten up.

Shi Yi leaned on the bed, staring at the rabbit, her eyes deep. After a while, she took the phone on the bedside table and unlocked the screen.

The screen interface still remains on the topic of "how to correctly recognize homosexuality" that she searched last night. Black words on a white background, the three words "homosexual" pierced his eyes like needles, Shi Yi's breathing was slightly stagnant, and took a deep breath, forcing himself to look directly at these words.

Follow the topic, she quit the app, opened QQ, hung her fingertips on the screen for a long time, still clicked on Jian Luhe's avatar, and said, "Are you awake?"

Jian Luhe almost immediately replied to her: "I just woke up. I was about to stay in bed and swipe my phone for a while. Your message came in. We are too in a tacit understanding."

Shi Yi didn't greet her, but went straight to the subject, "How is Si Tian?"

Jian Lu and surprised: "You asked me about this early in the morning?"

"Do you care about her? [smirk]"

"Or...you're also gossiping?"

Shi Yi was not in the mood to joke with her, "Don't tell me I will ask Fanlu."

Jian Luhe was anxious: "Hey, wait a minute, don't I care about you? You are too domineering, so you can ask others, can't others ask you?"

Although she was complaining, she still gave the answer: "Except for her severely swollen face, she looks pretty normal. It's not that I said Yang Yue's action was too heavy."

Shi Yi's heart hurts sharply.

"She is the kind of character that really doesn't show anything." Shi Yi reminded. She wanted to tell Jian Luhe to pay more attention to Fu Sitian, but she didn't know her standpoint.

"I think so." Jian Luhe asked deliberately: "Shi Yi, really, are you caring about her?"

Shi Yi knuckles curled up, and just when Jian Luhe thought she would not answer, she finally sent the simple but heavy "yes".

Jian Luhe excitedly said, "Do you want to make peace with her?" Shi Yi and Fu Sitian froze like this. As a friend of the two, it was actually quite uncomfortable for her to be in the middle.

Shi Yi was silent and did not answer. There was no answer in her heart.

But at least not now.

No longer evading, admitting that he likes Fu Sitian and that he has become...the same person as Shi Yuanmian. Although the feeling of losing control is relieved, the whole life track is still distorted. She stood in the mist, still not knowing where the road was going to lead, and where she was going. This was a road she had never walked, she had never thought about going. She was shackled on her back, she was not mentally prepared at all, and she didn't know how to go.

Contacting Fu Sitian irresponsibly will only bring more harm to her.

Besides, she can't decide whether to make peace or not.

Si Tian...maybe she doesn't need her anymore.

She reached out and held the little rabbit's paw in her hand, trying to fill the lack of her heart, but the tighter she held it, the more empty she felt. The cold eyebrows were full of bitterness. Shi Yi reached out and opened the drawer of the bedside table, took out his business card, and called the counselor above.

After raising the flag early on Monday morning, the soldiers were divided into two groups as usual. Yin Fanlu and Fu Sitian, Shi Yi and Jian Luhe went to the cafeteria for dinner. Jian Lu and yawned all the way, Shi Yi was funny: "Did you not sleep last night?"

Jian Lu and Sadly sat opposite Shi Yi, "I didn't sleep well."

"insomnia?"

"No." Jian Luhe glanced up at her, then looked around vigilantly, but still worried, decided to type on his mobile phone and say: "I was scared when I heard Si Tian crying last night."

Shi Yi stopped tearing the bread, and his heart sank.

Jian Lu and took back the phone and continued typing, "I approached and heard her crying while still saying sorry, her voice was very small. I guess she might be having a nightmare, and I want to open the bed curtain to wake her and I was afraid of scaring her. After hesitating for a while, her voice disappeared."

"After I climbed into bed, I was afraid that she would cry again, so I wanted to wait until I went to sleep. I didn't expect that I had been thinking about it, and I could not fall asleep after I went to bed."

"Have you heard her cry again?" Shi Yi's voice was low.

"No, she's fine in the morning. I suspect she doesn't know it herself."

Shi Yi looked solemn, "Have you ever talked to her about Yang Yue again?"

"No. She has always behaved normally. Fanlu and I didn't dare to mention this, for fear of poking her wound. In fact, I talked secretly with Fanlu. Although Si Tian is really gentle, but In fact, inside is a very hard person, really too afraid to trouble others, and too good at pretending to be okay."

"She doesn't say it, and we don't know how we can help her."

Shi Yi's lips pressed, and he didn't know how to eat.

The breakfast hastily ended, and when he entered the classroom, there was clearly a place in the middle, but Shi Yi had to sit in the last row uncharacteristically.

Jian Lu and inexplicably had to go with her.

Fu Sitian habitually enters the classroom through the back door, and when he sees Jian Lu and You Shiyi in the last row, he is obviously taken aback. But soon, she withdrew her gaze calmly and sat down in her usual sitting position.

Shi Yi hadn't looked at Fu Sitian recklessly in a long time. She is good at drawing and sensitive to lines. She was sure that Fu Sitian must have been thinner than she did during the last physical examination.

She stared at the thin back, knowing for the first time that one person could feel so sorry for another person.

During the large class, she went to the counselor's office for a meeting. After the meeting, she deliberately waited for the counselor's assistant to come out in the office.

The two had dealt with each other for more than a year, and the friendship was not bad, and Shi Yi successfully obtained the contact information of Aunt Yang Yue from her.

On Thursday, Jian Luhe had a bad stomach and had vomiting and diarrhea in the middle of the night. Fu Sitian accompanied her to the hospital for emergency treatment at five o'clock in the morning. The next day she asked for leave to rest in the dormitory. Shi Yi only found out after going to class. After greeting her on QQ, Jian Lu talked to her about the past.

"Last night when I was uncomfortable, it was already more than two o'clock in the morning. When I got in and out of bed, I was afraid that Fanlu would be noisy. I acted very lightly. After going up and down twice, Fanlu on the same side didn't feel anything at all, but Si Tian suddenly Poke your head to see what's wrong with me, is it uncomfortable."

"I asked her if I quarreled her, and she said no, she happened to have not slept yet. She said she had medicine, so she came down to find me the medicine. The medicine expired. Later I came to see that I was really not very good. She said to go to the hospital. I thought it was too dark outside, so I didn't dare to go, so I kept holding it. After five o'clock, there was a little car noise outside, and I couldn't help it. She said she was going to the hospital, so she accompanied me. "

"Fan Lu was really dead when she was sleeping, and she waited until dawn to realize that we were all gone." Jian Luhe was angry and funny.

Shi Yi's mind was completely off the track.

How could you just be awake after two o'clock? Didn’t you sleep all the time? There was a deep worry in her heart.

At more than two o'clock in the morning, Shi Yi suffered from insomnia again, staring at the small night light bought for Fu Sitian in a daze, thinking of Fu Sitian's trumpet in a ghostly manner.

The night before Fu Sitian left in July, she stayed up all night.

I couldn't understand why I wanted to kiss Fu Sitian at all, and couldn't understand why Fu Sitian closed his eyes. How can she close her eyes.

Shi Yi convinced himself that everything was just alcohol, but his reason refused to give in.

It was also like this, she turned up Fu Sitian's trumpet. The trumpet homepage and follower are clean, but in the like record that most people will forget to check, she saw a large number of Weibo related to Lily. At that moment, she felt that her whole head was unable to think, and the blood in her body was frozen.

Not an accident. Fu Sitian... It's very possible, it's a long-planned plan.

From the private message before the college entrance examination, to the familiar familiarity now. She was horrified by this possibility. Looking back at the past year, she suddenly didn't know how to look at Fu Sitian or how to face her.

Obviously she took the initiative more from the beginning to the end, but in order to hide the terrible facts she was moving, she angered, struggled, and escaped.

After that, she did not dare to open this Weibo again.

Today, the Weibo homepage is still the same as before, with only a few reposted Weibo posts. However, the number of items displayed on the homepage has increased significantly. Shi Yi guessed that Fu Sitian should have posted a Weibo that was only visible to him.

She shifted her gaze downwards and fell on a line of words-she had just liked this Weibo.

Just...that is to say, at this moment, Fu Sitian is not asleep like her. Shi Yi frowned. According to my understanding of living together for more than half a month, Fu Sitian has a healthy time to fall asleep and does not have the habit of staying up late to play mobile phones. Is it accidental?

But she observed for several nights and found that Fu Sitian was like this almost every night.

Shi Yi suspected her insomnia.

Thinking of her thinner and thinner figure, Shi Yi couldn't help but feel relieved. Several times, she clicked on Fu Sitian's portrait and wanted to say something to her, but in the end she was still restrained.

She wasn't sure if she really thought about it.

She cannot be so irresponsible to Fu Sitian, to her mother, and to herself.

But she didn't say anything, did nothing, and watched Fu Sitian feel uncomfortable, and she couldn't do it.

In the oral class on Thursday, when it was her turn to do Presentation, she chose a topic on "how to make a choice".

Her typhoon was calm, her English pronunciation was pleasing to the ear, and her slightly boring statements came out of her mouth, which became unexpectedly attractive.

The central thesis of the whole manuscript is "It is difficult to have a perfect choice for everyone in life. Different perspectives will make different evaluations of choices. So you don't have to demand a perfect choice, let alone blame yourself for imperfections."

She was talking to Fu Sitian. She hoped that Fu Sitian could understand.

She couldn't help lowering her head, looking for Fu Sitian's eyes in more than 30 pairs of looking up eyes, but among the more than 30 pairs of eyes, there was no Fu Sitian's pair alone.

Fu Sitian lowered his head, not looking at her.

Shi Yi's throat was astringent, and his calm tone, missing the rising tone, gradually went lower.