Reluctantly Willing

Chapter 108: Final Chapter

Gu Jun took a deep breath. At the end of the 30-minute break, he looked back and An Xiaoyan was nowhere in sight. Maybe he might not come today. It did not matter. Gu Jun would be satisfied with himself today if he were to be able to express what was in his heart.

“I used to hate a person and I hated him so much that I wished he could die to make up for his sin. I beat him, scolded him, insulted him, and did everything I could to humiliate him. Because at that time, my heart was fearful and I thought that only by making him fearful of me can I hide my insecurities.

“But I have experienced many things in the process. I don’t know why but I like that person very much. I want to see him laugh and give him the best things. At this time, I found that the foolish things that I had done had left indelible traces in that person’s body and mind. I tried to get close to him and give him a little warmth, but my attempts all failed.

“If that was the end, maybe there wouldn’t be so many things happening now. After that, I thought of a lot of ways to treat him well. I went to his city and squatted at the breakfast shop every day to see him more. I bought a house from which I could just see him watering the plants on the roof. I was thinking, even if I could only accompany him this way for a lifetime, it is not out of the question. The fact is that people do not always get what they want. But it was my fault for being too rash as I was eager to see results.

“I became the chairman of Gu Group. This position did not give me a sense of superiority. Instead, it made me feel constrained because I was no longer the person who could do what I wanted to do. I had to take care of the company because it is the Gu family’s magnum opus. On top of that, I had to listen to other people’s arrangements and put the next generation into consideration.

“Although the state does not have laws allowing homosexuals to marry, the whole society has generally accepted homosexuality. In developed areas, it is very common for a man to be with another man. However, my family can’t accept it. They think that I can’t have children with a man, so they try hard to obstruct us.”

The chief judge interrupted Gu Jun, “Your data shows that you have a son.”

“Gu Jun nodded, “I have a son, and I love him very much, but my family does not acknowledge him. My son’s mental development was slow when he was a child and he spoke at a later age than his peers. Now he has gradually become normal. I think one day, he will go to school and fall in love like a normal child. However, Old Mr. Gu feels that my child would be a fool in the future. He forced me to marry a woman and even used my child to threaten me to get engaged. I obeyed and got engaged for the sake of my child. After that, I was asked to attend the engagement banquet. There was no way out. All of the Gu Group’s senior staff were under the control of Old Mr. Gu, and I was in a passive situation.

“Now, I finally understand that money and a career can come back to you while love will never come back, so those things are no longer important to me. What I need is a person to accompany me. We will go to the supermarket to buy food in the evening, and raise cats and dogs together. We can also share the same hobbies and live happily together. Even though that person hasn’t accepted me yet, I’m ready.”

Gu Jun bowed to show that he had finished speaking, and the judge nodded to let him sit down.

An Xiaoyan, who was sitting at the far end and wearing a hat, heard these words. A sensation like a series of electric currents passed through his body from head to toe, making him feel numb all over.

He was really surprised to hear such a promise in public.

Gu Jun had to do so many things against his own will. He only wished Gu Jun would not betray him. In fact, Gu Jun had given up too much for him.

There are many ways to express your love when you love someone. Some would sacrifice a lot while others would give things up. Things which were sacrificed were clearly seen while things which you have given up were usually left unseen unless one intentionally finds out the truth.

An Xiaoyan was a person who had sacrificed a lot and gave himself a reason to accept Gu Jun while Gu Jun gave up his glory and wealth to be with An Xiaoyan forever.

These words came from the heart and many people in the court were moved. The judge turned to Old Mr. Gu and asked him what he thought.

The representative conveyed Old Mr. Gu’s thoughts saying that as long as Gu Jun could marry Xiu Yijian, he would agree to all conditions. He could forget about Gu Jun’s past with An Xiaoyan, but he could not tolerate a man marrying into the Gu family.

Gu Jun turned around and sneered at Old Mr. Gu. “After all this, you still can’t see what I really want. What I want is simply a happy relationship and I don’t care about anything else.”

The moment when he turned back, he glanced from the corner of his eye and caught a glimpse of a thin man sitting at the far end whose figure resembled that of An Xiaoyan. Gu Jun thought he had made a mistake and looked back again. This time, the seat was empty.

Having revealed the differences between the two sides, things would naturally be resolved. Finally, the chief judge proposed that Old Mr. Gu to agree to the fact that his son, Gu Jun, was with a man, so that their relationship could be eased and the interests of the company could be safeguarded. The state clearly recognizes that homosexuals also have relevant rights, and others cannot insult them. This also meant that what Gu Jun did was not wrong.

Hearing that, Old Mr. Gu’s blood pressure almost shot up again. The older generation had a rigid idea that a man should marry a woman and carry on the family line.

The lawyer beside Old Mr. Gu advised him to listen to the chief judge’s proposed arrangement. After all, Gu Jun was willing to come forward to reconcile now, and if this fell through, he might not even come again next time.

Old Mr. Gu took a hypertension pill and felt better. He had no choice but to give up.

At last, Old Mr. Gu agreed to the proposal. However, he did not wait to hear the final verdict and left angrily with his crutch.

Since Old Mr. Gu had agreed to all the conditions, Mr. Gu added a clause to the contract stating that non-corporate personnel would not be able to participate in the company’s top management ruling, which meant that Old Mr. Gu had no rights in the company.

Finally, after he signed in agreement to the final verdict, Gu Jun looked at it and saw that it stated that all his assets would be returned to him. This made him feel that these recent months had been a dream.

A few days ago, he was still a poor man, and now he was the chairman of the Gu Group again, with tens of billions of assets.

Chen Chen was happy for Gu Jun, who had restored his glory as the elite of the society.

“I think I saw An Xiaoyan just now, but once I turned my head around again, he was gone. Is it true that he was here?”

Chen Chen did not notice An Xiaoyan’s presence, but Gu Jun had a feeling that the man he saw was him and was sure that he must be nearby.

“Help me make arrangements to take back all my previous assets and bring Guo Guo back to the villa.”

Chen Chen nodded and went back with Guo Guo while Gu Jun left the court only after everyone was dismissed from the courtroom.

It happened to be a sunny day outside, and beside the court was a small park. Gu Jun suddenly feel like taking a stroll there.

As he turned right along the path, he saw An Xiaoyan sitting on the bench beside the road wearing a hooded sweater. Their eyes met.

Gu Jun stopped walking and looked at An Xiaoyan while An Xiaoyan looked back at Gu Jun. Each of them looked at the other quietly with neither of them having the intention to take the first step forward.

An Xiaoyan’s clothes were exactly what Gu Jun saw inside the courtroom. He knew that when he was making his case to the chief judge, An Xiaoyan was right there, watching him from behind his back.

Ginkgo trees were planted on both sides of the path. It was autumn and the leaves began to turn yellow. When the wind blew, many fruits hanging on the tree were colliding with each other while the leaves rustled near them.

At this moment, it felt as if the world was left with just the two of them.

Gu Jun walked slowly to sit beside An Xiaoyan, who wrapped himself tightly with his sweater and had no intention of leaving.

A cloud drifted past and blocked the sun while the wind blew again. It was chilly.

“Was that you just now?”

“I heard what you said.” An Xiaoyan answered, and casually put his hand in his pocket.

“Can you forgive me?”

An Xiaoyan turned his face and looked into Gu Jun’s eyes. At all times, a person’s eyes do not lie and the love and hatred of the person would truly be reflected in it. At this moment, Gu Jun’s eyes were full of love and anticipation. He had made a decision, and did not care what would happen in the future as the present was what he wanted.

“Gu Jun, I am a little cold.”

Gu Jun hesitated for a moment and put his hand into An Xiaoyan’s pocket. His big hand held An Xiaoyan’s small hand. His warmth passed to the other man through the palm of his hand. An Xiaoyan’s hand tightened unconsciously, his head slightly tilted and leaned against Gu Jun’s shoulder.

They clasped their hands and the most beautiful image of autumn was painted.

In the evening, Gu Jun came to the river crossing bridge with An Xiaoyan. The Oriental Eye opposite the bridge was turning slowly. Standing on the bridge, they could clearly see every cabin of the Ferris Wheel and several people who were inside the cabin were shouting with their mouths open.

The river continued to flow beneath them. Gu Jun was still holding on to An Xiaoyan’s hand. When the two of them leaned on the railing to look down, Gu Jun’s hand moved to An Xiaoyan’s shoulder and he held An Xiaoyan tightly in his arms.

An Xiaoyan remembered the letter Liu Cheng had given him, saying that when he had accepted everything in his life, he could open it. He felt that it was the right time now.

He took the letter with him everywhere he went. When he took it out from the middle layer of his clothes, the design on it had already faded.

He did not avoid Gu Jun and tore open the seal directly. There was a piece of paper in it. After reading the letter, An Xiaoyan tore it up into pieces.

Fragments of the letter were like snowflakes flying in the sky as the wind blew, finally falling into the river, drifting with the waves.

Gu Jun did not look at the content on the paper. As Liu Cheng’s death was somewhat related to him, he should really bear part of the responsibility. Now that Liu Cheng had passed away, there was no need to be calculative regarding that man anymore.

An Xiaoyan leaned close on Gu Jun’s shoulders. Now that they were both very happy, there was no need to think about the past.

Love and hate were relative. When two persons got together, the amount of hate and love they had for each other would be relative.

The last letter from Liu Cheng said: “Yan Zi, there’s been something on my mind for a long time. I have been very guilty, but I have never dared to tell you. Now that you have accepted everything in your life, I can rest assured to tell you about it. Years ago, during the operation, I saw the other child in the stomach of the pregnant woman. The child was likely a stillborn and was very small. But because I was jealous of you, I did not tell you. I did not know this would create such a big impact on you and I feel very guilty for all that has happened to you. However, God has punished me, and we are even now.

Those inheritances I left to you are my compensation for your suffering. Can we still be best friends?

May you find love in your life… Kindhearted people should always be treated with kindness.”