Ravish Me, Oh Great Wizard King!!!

"Come! Have dinner with us."

"I've already eaten, Your Majesty."

"Eat some more. Sit. I want to talk to you about something important."

Daran raised his eyebrows and took a chair next to Tinsel Pomfrey.

Immediately, the serving maids set a new plate in front of him while others brought more food to the table. They began loading up the steaming roast boar and mashed potatoes in front of Daran.

Sighing with resignation, Daran tore into the food.

"I thought you said you ate already." Tinsel smiled wearily.

"I ate a serving of salad before I came," Daran grunted as he shoved more food into his mouth.

Tinsel raised an eyebrow. "How can a battle-hardened warrior eat just one serving of salad? Don't you do daily rounds and spar with your men?"

Daran patted his stomach. "I need to lose some of this weight."

"For what, man?"

Daran paused for a moment. The fork in his hand with its load of skewered roast boar wavered.

He sighed and shoved the meat into his mouth. "A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do."

Mira laughed. "Did Carol say something to you about your gut busting out of your clothes?"

Daran shook his head. "She would never say anything so crass. I just…" he put down his fork. "I just wanted to look a little better for her."

Tinsel clucked his tongue. "You look fine, man. You're a dwarf. Your body is strong and stocky by nature. Skipping meals is not going to turn you into a tall gaunt scarecrow like me."

"Oh you two stop that. You're not fat. And you," she turned to Tinsel Pomfrey, "are not a tall gaunt scarecrow."

"That is true but a few pounds less will be better for my health, Your Majesty." Daran looked down at the pudgy beer belly he sported.

Mira sighed. She knew that Carol had been fighting a losing battle with obesity for quite some time now. It could be that he was helping her with a new fight by joining her diet so they could fight together.

She waved to the serving maids. "Take his plate away and give him a large mug of water."

Tinsel reached for a hot roll. "Your Majesty, the man barely touched his plate. He looks starved. Let him eat."

Mira shook her head. "Take it away."

"Yes, Your Majesty." With supreme efficiency, his food was taken away and a huge mug of water was placed in front of him.

Daran picked up the water mug and drank with grateful gulps.

"Daran, have you heard anything more about where Zander could be?"

The dwarf shook his head. "My men have been searching for him. As soon as I get word of his whereabouts, you will be the first person I notify."

"Do you think he has been...harmed in any way?" Mira's voice shook. She did not want to think about this possibility, but she had to find out all she could about the situation.

Daran shook his head. "I don't think so. If he had been harmed, those who sought to harm him would parade that news out immediately. The Northern Realm is a huge plum that many are salivating over. With Zander and his parents gone, Diamond and the Northern Realm will be overrun in no time."

Tinsel nodded. "The fact that Diamond is still on solid footing is because everyone knows there is a powerful wizard sitting on the throne at Diamond."

Mira shot him a questioning glance.

"That wizard is you."

"What? I'm just a temporary placeholder until my husband returns."

Daran tapped a fist to his heart. "You are a mighty mage in your own rights. You are the powerful Glockomancer Queen of Diamond!"

Mira felt like laughing and crying at the same time. It would have been so funny if Zander was here to laugh about it with her.

But he was gone---and she missed him so much.

"Daran. I need to go find my husband. Zander is out there somewhere all by himself, and I know he needs me, but I don't know where to begin looking."

She wrung her hands. "Erick said he would also be casting a spy net out to search for Zander but so far, nothing has turned up."

Tinsel Pomfrey sighed. "Ashrya is a huge territory. If you don't know where or how to start looking, you can spend a very long time searching but never finding the person you are looking for."

"But do not be too overly worried," he said with a worried look at Mira. "You have both Daran's men and Prince Erick's men searching for King Zander. If anyone can find him, they will be able to."

Daran banged on the table. "You have done a phenomenal job of stabilizing the kingdom and maintaining it. When the Wizard King returns, he won't be faced with a disastrous war to have to clean up."

Mira covered her face with her hands. "I don't know if what I'm doing is good enough though. So far, several people have died under my watch."

"Your Majesty, if I may." Daran counseled. "at this time, the best thing you can do for your husband and the kingdom is to continue what you are doing."

He turned to her as Tinsel nodded. "You have already taken out two of the most disruptive forces within the Ashryan kingdom. There are a few others, but they are lying low right now so at least they are not rocking the boat."

Daran laughed. "You're cleaning out the cobwebs and the rat turds. Please continue the good work."

Tinsel laughed and lifted his wine goblet. Daran lifted his water mug and with a clink, the two drank to the cobwebs and turds housekeeping.

Mira pondered their words for a while. What seemed to her to be unnecessarily bloody was to them simple housekeeping. It seemed as if the King's Court was a constant battlefield where deaths were common--even expected.

Mira steeled her resolve not to fail her man. Without Zander or his parents here, it fell on her to cover all the bases and continue what he was working on.

"Yes. They are still there."

"Please keep me updated on what you find in Peridot."

"Yes, Your Majesty."

"I need you to do something else for me."

"Your Majesty?" Daran gave a questioning gaze.

"I want you to snoop around Citrine?" She began briefing him on what Tinsel Pomfrey had discovered from the bookkeepers at Dolmian Palace.

The more Daran heard, the wider his eyes popped.

Finally, he gave a whistle and rubbed his head. "This is major. If you total up three years of wealth that got drained out of Dolmia, that would be…"

"That would be enough to fund a major war." Tinsel muttered and drained his goblet.

The serving maid immediately refilled his glass with more of the ruby liquid.

Mira sliced into the boar meat. "How do you know it's for a war?"

"You see all those boxes and chests piled up out in the entry hall? That's just a tiny portion of what's here in the palace. The entire castle is filled with these boxes and chests."

"What the hell's in those boxes?" Daran interjected.

"They're all filled with weapons and armor for a huge army. The Duchess Hilda Cartier was using this castle as a storage facility for war preparations."

Daran's face grew somber. "We got damn lucky it never got shipped out."

"I think they were just waiting for the signal to coordinate their movements."

"So money flows to Citrine, meanwhile armory is stashed here. I wonder why Zander was so concerned with Peridot. Hopefully I will get word from my men soon."

"We're going to have to guard this place." Daran said with force. "If there is this much weaponry here, someone will come and try to take them back."

Tinsel Pomfrey nodded. "Coordinate your efforts with Commandant General Alfric Hobart as soon as possible. He needs to bring troops here to Dolmia."

Mira set her fork down and sat back. She was touching the periphery of a huge catastrophe about to happen. What did a person like her know about war?

"Daran, there is one last thing I need your help with."

"Your Majesty?" Daran asked as he brought the

"I need to get back to Earth."

Daran gasped, choking on his water.

"Why? When?"

"As soon as it's prudent, but it has to be done at night so I can be back on Earth at daybreak."

"Only one day?"

"Yes. I only need to be there to pick up a few items. We can be back by morning. It will simply look as if we just went to sleep and woke up. It's just...the portal by the bog is very far from here…"

"We don't have to make that trip on foot. I can just port you directly to Tourmaline Bog from here, Your Majesty."

"That was my plan. We can leave as soon as you have some free time."

"Let's go tonight."