Ravish Me, Oh Great Wizard King!!!

Nonna Pearla's food was amazing.

No.

It was super amazing.

Mira could not believe how good it was. The woman could make breakfast gruel taste heavenly. Her stuffed quail and buttered corn bread was not just scrumptious. It was to die for.

Mira was stuffing her face with the last of the cornbread when Nonna Pearla's husband returned.

"Is that her? The girl that killed the bogwargs?" A voice called out from the doorway.

Mira looked up from her plate. She could see the old dwarf at the doorway. Behind him were six other dwarves and they were pushing at him from behind so they could catch a glimpse of her.

"Stop pushing. The doorway isn't big enough for more than one of you to walk through at a time." He took his hat off and walked towards her.

She stood up. Obviously the dwarves had found the corpses of the bogwargs she had killed last night. She wasn't sure what their reaction would be.

The old dwarf nodded his head, in his eyes shone a newfound respect. "We never did get a chance to talk much last night. My wife says your name is Mira Lee."

"Yes. I want to thank you for helping me last night." She hesitated, not knowing how much or how little to say.

"It's nice to meet you, young lady. I'm Alfric Hobart, one of the village elders." He threw a careless hand at the four dwarves behind him. "...and these bozos are the resident village idiots."

Mira scanned the small crowd behind Alfric Hobart as he named them all.

There was a portly looking dwarf with a long beard named Boris, and beside him was Victor, a muscular looking bald fellow. Standing further back was a wiry thin dwarf with a round pink nose named Edwin, and the last one, hiding behind him, was Ziggy, a young guy wearing a red hat.

"It's a pleasure to meet everyone. Thank you so much for your kindness. I was ready to drop last night from exhaustion." Mira smiled.

"We take care of each other here," Alfric Hobart rubbed the back of his neck. "This is a border town, and it's hard to survive out here without everyone helping each other as best we can."

"Border town? This is not Tourmaline?"

"It is, but we are living at the far-flung edge of Tourmaline, right up against the Bog. The center of town is another half-an-hour walk from here if you take surface roads." Long Beard Boris replied.

"Or you can take the subterranean rail and get there much faster!" One of the dwarves in the back volunteered. It was Ziggy with the red hat.

"Where do you come from, that you had to walk all by yourself in the middle of the night through Tourmaline Bog?" Victor scratched his bald head. He was the only one brave enough to ask the one question everyone was dying to know.

"And how in heavens were you able to kill the bogwargs by yourself?" Boris Long Beard added.

Mira stared at them. Of all possible responses, the truth was not something she could reveal. How could she possibly say that she came from a different world, in a different dimension, carrying a weapon from that world?

The only thing that could be revealed would be that which was far more mundane, or at the very least...acceptable to their frame of reference.

It would be easier for them to accept the fact that she was married to a Crown Prince, rather than telling them about a portal connecting two different worlds, appearing in the middle of a bog that could only be accessed at twilight.

Slowly, she pulled off her cap. The morning sun reflected off the metal band, flared at the dwarves, blinding them for a moment.

Suddenly, they all dropped to one knee.

Everyone knew what the crown meant, and where it came from.

"Please forgive us, your Royal Highness. We did not know it was you." The bald dwarf rasped, his head bowed, not daring to look at her.

"You all know who I am." It was not a question. It was obvious that they did.

"We may be living on the fringes, but everyone heard what happened two days ago, when the chiros firebombed Diamond Palace." Alfrick Hobart said.

"What have you heard about the events of two days ago?" Mira queried. At the moment that the attack happened, she had been whisked away by Zander, so everything else that occurred was a big unknown to her.

"We heard that the Crown Prince had taken a bride, and after the attack, his bride went missing. Everybody assumed that you were kidnapped." Bald Head looked up. "We also heard the king and queen was taken away as hostages, and Prince Zander rushed away to rescue them...and to find you."

They all looked at each other, then back at her. This young woman sitting here with crumbs of Nonna Pearla's amazing cornbread stuck to her lips had to be the new Princess.

"Please---please rise." Mira waved a hand of protest. She was not used to this pomp and circumstance.

"If I may ask, Your Royal Highness, what kind of magik did you use to kill the bogwargs?" Red Hat

Mira pursed her lips. How could she explain it so that these people could grasp it in the easiest way? "Ummmm. I used a---a Glock, which is a---ummm…"

"Glock magik! I've never heard of that!" Ziggy exclaimed.

"I've never heard of Glockomancy either, but it's probably very old magik that can be found in one of those books that the Royal Wizards have in their libraries." Edwin Round Nose said.

"Oh yes! I've heard of their libraries before. It's floor-to-ceiling books on every kind of magik you can think of!." Ziggy began to get excited. "Did you see how powerful that glockomancy magik was? It's so powerful that it only needs to make a tiny hole so that the magik can enter the body and kill the person!"

Mira bit her lip. There was no way she could possibly explain a gun to them. And now that they were completely enamored with what they had enthusiastically named Glockomancy, she just did not have the heart to tell them it was not real magik.

"I can't believe our own Princess is a Glockomancer Wizard. I'm just thrilled to my bones!" Edwin laughed.

"Would you expect our mighty Crown Prince to marry anyone but the very best?" Victor raised a fist to the air. "The princess's husband is a famous Aeromancer, the Storm Lord and Crown Prince De Zander Tamein of the Northern Realm. How could his wife be any less impressive?"

"I am shaken to my very core," Boris shook his head and placed his hand on his chest. "I cannot even imagine our Princess, surrounded by thirteen bogwargs and coming out alive and well."

Mira raised her hand. "Wait...how did you know I killed thirteen bogwargs?"

Boris lifted his head. "Old Alfric Hobart gathered us early this morning to go out there and take care of the bodies. We can't leave them out there like that. They would attract the worst kind of vermin, and it would spoil the waters of the marshes, where we cultivate our medicinal herbs."

Just then, Nonna Pearla walked in through the doorway holding onto Felix. She had put a diaper on him, and over that, she had clothed him in some warm baby clothes.

"A bogwarg puppy???" Ziggy inhaled sharply.

"Yes." Nonna Pearla laughed. "His name is Felix, and he's actually a very cute little tyke."

"How did you get your hands on this puppy?" Ziggy rubbed his eyes.

Nanna Pearla rubbed Felix's head. "The mother died, so Mira Lee picked up the poor little thing and took him with her."

"Wife. Show your respects," Alfrick extended his hand to Mira. "This is Her Royal Highness, the Princess Mira Lee of Tamein. She is the Crown Prince's wife."

Nonna Pearla's eyes darted between Mira and Alfrick, as if to confirm the information. With a sudden jerk of insight, she quickly dropped down on her knees. "I am so sorry, Your Royal Highness. I did not know…"

Mira sprang up. Grabbing Nonna Pearla by the shoulders, she helped the old woman back on her feet. "Nonna, please don't do that. You've been so kind to me and little Felix. I owe you and your husband a debt of gratitude."

Alfric Hobart shifted his weight from one leg to the other. "We owe much to your husband, the Wizard Prince Zander Tamein. To be able to help his wife is our honor, Your Royal Highness."

Nonna Pearla's eyes widened. "You must get to Diamond Palace, quickly. There is no one left to hold the Northern Realm stable. The King and Queen have been taken away by a group of powerful wizards, and Prince Zander has gone to rescue them."