Ms. Me

After a week Rave asked me to have a date. Today we are going to meet, hmm what should I wear? This? Nah too edgy. How about this? Hmmmm too soft. I'll just wear my usual white shirt ,black pants and converse. I am so excited to see him it's been a while since we saw each other.

On my way to the restaurant I don't feel any excitement hence I feel nervous. I don't know why this is happening to me. Probably trauma? Anxiety? Who knows right?.

'HI ME!' as soon as he arrived he greeted me. 'how are you doing? ' he asked me. To be honest like what I've said earlier I am not feeling well that is why I kinda change the topic. 'shall we order first?' I said to him. And he agreed with it and we had our meal first before chatting again. 'how are you doing?' he asked me again. And this time I replied and said 'not good and not fine, I feel like everytime something bad is going t happen. Probably anxiety or trauma. Right? I don't know hahahhaa'. 'oh sorry , by the way I heard that you are studying Korean?' he asked '응 (yes)' I replied. 'cool what does it mean?' he asked . and the chatting continued.

As soon as I woke up I asked my family where is Rave and it looks like he is in a bad condition because no one answered my question. After a while my Stef answered. 'icu' then I started to cry again until I passed out again. While I am still sleeping my doctor said that I won't be allowed to go to school for a week. Because I need rest. I need to take a break from everything that happened to me. And I am also receiving special care from the psychologists.

After a week I feel good. I don't feel any anxiety anymore. I guess this is the right time to see Rave right? And I heard that he is also doing well now. I should check on him.

As soon as I enter his room. I heard him asking for Katrina. And I felt curious so I hid for a while and eavesdrop. 'where is Katrina mom? How is she doing? Is she already here in the Philippines? Can you ask her to come here and visit me? I miss her so much. And also tell her I love her' he said. I am shocked from what I heard that I accidentally drop my bag. It looks like they heard about it so what I did is just run away. But John caught me. He asked me something if I can show up in front of him. And ask him if he knows me. I agreed with him.

As soon as I got in his room he is acting puzzled saying 'It's like I've seen her before. Who is she?' this is when I started crying again and I decided to just leave him so that he won't have a hard time thinking who am I.