In the Same Boat

He didn’t know. Nobody knew what it meant to like somebody back then, Qu Yiheng thought.

They chatted for a while, and it was a good first time to catch up.

Qu Yiheng continued to show Yao Zhan around the building, saying, “This building is the one we used to come to most often, in fact there are several buildings now that weren’t even finished at the time.”

They went up to the fourth floor and Qu Yiheng pointed ahead, “Further ahead is our ……”

Before he could finish his sentence, he froze.

Yao Zhan looked at him in uncertainty and found his eyes staring at a painting on the wall not far away.

“What’s wrong?” Yao Zhan asked.

Qu Yiheng let go of Yao Zhan’s hand and took a step to walk under that painting, then tilted his head to look at it, his eyes unblinking.

Yao Zhan followed him over and looked at the painting as well.

He did not know art and could not read the painting, but could only see that it was the city after the rain. Every part of the painting was damp and slightly cool, but clean, and the picture as a whole was in cold tones, but in the bottom right corner there was a woman in a red dress standing in the rain with her back to them, and this splash of red lit up the grey, rainy day.

Yao Zhan found a card attached to the bottom of this painting, with the name of the author and some other information written on the card.

“An award-winning work.” Yao Zhan had no idea about these awards at all, but he saw that Qu Yiheng kept staring at the painting, so he thought the other party must have liked it, “It’s quite pretty.”

“Do you know what this painting is called?”

Yao Zhan saw the name printed on that card, so he replied, “In the Rain.”

Qu Yiheng laughed and suddenly took Yao Zhan’s hand, leading him forward without looking back.

He said, “This painting is called ‘Blowing in the wind.”

Blowing in the wind?

Yao Zhan looked back again, the painting was clearly of rain, why was it called “Blowing in the wind”?

They didn’t go on and it was Yao Zhan who asked to leave because he found that ever since he saw the painting, Qu Yiheng wasn’t as excited as he was before.

Still holding hands, they returned from the comfort and coolness of the school building to the scorching outdoors.

Yao Zhan said, “Your school is very nice.”

“It’s just superficially calm.” Qu Yiheng led him towards the main entrance, “There are dark tides beneath the surface that you outsiders can’t see.”

Yao Zhan suddenly had the feeling of being led by Qu Yiheng to relive the other party’s life again when he was about twenty years old. Only he was walking there, but there were many mysteries. The fifteen-year gap between them that really can not be made up.

That night, Qu Yiheng stayed with Yao Zhan and did not go home.

They had sex all night long.

Yao Zhan was obsessed with the tattoos on Qu Yiheng’s body, especially the line on his shoulder that he couldn’t read, and this time he asked what the line meant, to which Qu Yiheng simply replied, “A phrase in Spanish.”

The two of them tossed and turned until late in the night, and since Yao Zhan had to go to class the next day, they had to wash up and sleep well.

While Yao Zhan was in the shower, Qu Yiheng lay in bed looking at him through the clear glass, tracing the other man’s body with his eyes.

He thought of his unfinished painting and thought of speeding up in the next two days to make sure he finished it before this person left.

It had been a long time since Qu Yiheng had gone to sleep with someone else and woke up together. Before he fell asleep, Yao Zhan held him in his arms. When he opened his eyes the other party was standing in front of the window drinking coffee.

“What time is it?” Qu Yiheng’s voice was a little hoarse, which was the result of being unable to restrain himself last night.

“7:40.” Seeing that he was awake, Yao Zhan put down his cup and walked over to the bed. He bent down and kissed Qu Yiheng’s forehead.

The stay-over was already overly ambiguous, and this kiss had to stir up Qu Yiheng even more.

The warmth was a little too much.

Qu Yiheng was suddenly afraid.

“I’m ready to go, you can sleep a little longer.” Yao Zhan said, “I’ll leave the room card for you, and there’s breakfast until ten o’clock.”

“What about you?”

“I’m not eating, and we’ll be back together tonight anyway, so you can just take the room card.”

Yao Zhan said it as a matter of course, as if they were supposed to be together.

Qu Yiheng shrank under the blanket and said after a moment of silence, “I’ll go with you.”

“Don’t.” Yao Zhan didn’t let him move, “You got it a bit bad last night, I just went downstairs to buy some ointment, it’s too late to put it on you, you can do it yourself later.”

He picked up his bag and went back to the bed, saying somewhat apologetically, “I’m sorry for last night.”

Qu Yiheng blinked at him, not knowing what to say.

“I’m leaving first. You can put on the medicine and get some sleep, I’ll be more gentle next time.”

Yao Zhan left a kiss on the tip of Qu Yiheng’s nose and then touched his face again, “See you tonight.”

Qu Yiheng thought he might not have woken up yet, otherwise why was this all so strange?

He and Yao Zhan are unspoken friends with benefits, but that scene just now seemed to be a conversation between lovers.

It made him very uneasy.

He glanced at the ointment on the table and sighed.

After Yao Zhan left, Qu Yiheng did not go back to sleep. After putting the medicine on, he stood in front of the window looking out at the chaos in his head, and he began to think seriously about his relationship with Yao Zhan.

In fact, Qu Yiheng knows very well that he has special feelings for Yao Zhan, which could not be defined as love yet, it’s not that deep, but good feelings were there.

It’s just that the two of them are in different cities, and they haven’t seen each other for many years, and don’t know each other well. Not to mention that Yao Zhan has said that he hasn’t come out of the closet with his family yet.

More importantly, no matter how gentle and considerate Yao Zhan acts, there was never discussion with him how the relationship was defined between the two of them

When a man doesn’t want to be responsible but is greedy for that warmth, he chooses to be in a relationship this way, which he is aware of.

Qu Yiheng felt upset, and the main reason he was upset was that it was very difficult to bear when he realised that Yao Zhan most likely did not want to take responsibility for this relationship.