Author Note: UwO

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The Twins or more commonly known as the Crossing was magnificent, I know the lord leading them is a piece of shit but the castle and seat of House Frey is quite the sight.

"We are here my King," Ned informed me, he had repeated in the trip over a hundred times that I had to be cautious with Lord Frey because he only played for his own benefit, not shit Sherlock.

"I know," I nodded, seeing the Frey's castle from afar, so far I could note that their castle consisted of two near-identical towers that were considerably bigger and a fortified bridge over the Green Fork of the River Trident, which made it almost impossible to cross to the south without paying them, quite a smart tactic of the Frey's predecessors to rise in power to be honest.

After all, they made the The Twins represent the only crossing point over the Green Fork for hundreds of miles in either direction. Turning their entire castle in a barrier to travelers and merchants traveling from the North to the western Riverlands.

And while you can go around… it would be quite the trip...Moving from one point to the other while avoiding the Twins would require an absurdly lengthy detour of hundreds of miles to the south or hazardously traversing the bogs and swamps of the Neck to the north. Like I said the Frey that had this idea was a genius.

Too bad that what It took three generations to build in six hundred years would fall under my iron fist, the Frey's were unfortunately for them unimportant and brought more problems that helped, so I would have to erase them from the nobles houses.

"It seems they were waiting for, intriguing," Oberyn smiled, as I turned my attention to the gates, and like Oberyn said, it seems they knew I was coming and were expecting me, because a few men were coming out towards me in horses, Lord Frey among them.

"I wonder what plot is cooking that old bastard," I chuckled.

"Well… whatever it is will end with him screaming and us laughing," Oberyn smiled making me laugh, while Ned and Jon sighed in disapproval.

"I won't kill people for fun, but that doesn't mean that when they do deserve to be killed I won't enjoy it," I smirked as the self righteous duo.

"Amen to that," Oberyn nodded.

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Lord Frey had invited us to a feast… but requested we didn't bring our weapons, sometimes I wonder…. do I have a sign on my head that says I'm an idiot? Or something… like even without my knowledge of the Red Wedding I could still see through this shit… but what it was new was that he wanted to talk to me about alliance first.

So if I had to take a wild guess… I would say he wanted to see if I could offer him something better that he had been offered, but unless he was looking for a slow death ending in decapitation and the total annihilation of his house I had nothing to offer.

"My King, take a seat if you want," Walder Frey said with a friendly tone, impressive he can hide so well his motives, I suppose he has lived this long for a reason.

"I would rather not," I answered as I gave him a look demanding for him to say whatever he wanted to say so we could get this over with.

"Wine my King?" Joyeuse Erenford said with a weak tone, she was the wife of Walder Frey, she was around my age maybe younger, and was forced to marry an eighty year old man… her face of utter despair and defeat were more than enough to tell me she didn't like her life at all.

"Don't ask and do it woman!" Walder Frey barked at her, "I must apologize… all women are good for is to spread their legs and push babies out, and both require them to spread their legs haha," he laughed, the bastard laughed, "I'm sure you must understand the feeling,"

"Was this your plan? To infuriate me so much that I would unavoidably jump at you and rip out that head of yours apart with my bare hands?" I growled, indirectly he had insulted my wife and daughter, and then he tried to connect with me by thinking I understood his wretched mind, and ended up insulting my family directly!

"I would never do that my King," Walder Frey said as he motion his guards to stick close to him, "I just said women need to understand their place,"

"Oh please drop your weapons, if I wanted to hurt anyone here, I would've done so already!" I smirked at the old man, "And no, while it's true we differ in many things everyone is capable of greatness regardless of your gender,"

"I see it is a sensitive topic," Walder Frey smiled, and then I realized he was testing how to push my buttons, clever old man, but why poke a beast you can't possibly tame?

"What do you want for us to cross, spit it out old man, I don't have time to waste," I smirked at him, "And considering your age, I would say time is a commodity so don't waste it,"

This made Walder Frey glare at me for a second, before he returned to his fake sweet old man, "I suppose you are right, very well, what I want is your son and daughter to marry one of my sons and daughters, it can be anyone, when they come to age of course, I have one already baking with my newest wife,"

"Wow," I chuckled, I had reached a point of anger. I wasn't angry anymore. This decrepit old walking corpse wanted to force my children to marry his disgusting, pathetic, vomit provoking kin?

"I think it is a fair price for free passing," Walder Frey smiled.

"Hahahaha!" I laughed as I tried to formulate what to say or do, this was a new level of idiotic boldness I was not prepared to deal with, "You want… hahaha to… oh god, I'm so angry haha, I… know my actions right now tell you otherwise, but I'm fucking boiling with anger hahaha,"

"I take that as a no then," Walder Frey said, showing his real disgusting self for the first time.

"Absofuckinglutly!" I growled, breaking the table between us in two with a punch, "I won't force them to marry, and even if I did it wouldn't be with your family,"

Walder Frey stood silent for a second, impressed by my display of raw strength, "Very well, I suppose if we can't do that, you can pay the toll, one million gold dragons for a year of passage sounds fair?"

"Yes," I smiled, knowing full well that after this failure he was going back to his original plan, killing me on the feast.

"See you tomorrow at the feast," Walder Frey smiled at me.

"I wouldn't miss a party like that," I smiled back.

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[Oberyn Martell POV]

When Ronard had returned from his meeting with Lord Frey he was agitated, I had learned to read his body language, for safety reasons. Ronard was possibly one of the best man to hang out with when he is happy, but angry he is a fucking natural disaster.

"I take it the old man pissed you off?" I inquired, and Ronard smiled at that, as he started to fill his round table of what had happened.

Lord Frey wanted to marry one of his sons and daughters to Ronard's heirs, and our benevolent King rejected, and frankly who wouldn't, that old bastard is nothing but trouble, but what made my night was that Ronard's suspicions were right. His spy inside the castle had informed him that Lord Frey would strike during the feast when we were unarmed, and that this meeting was to see if he could get a bigger slice of cake, and once he didn't get what he wanted… well here we are.

"Well, well, well, now this is a real party," I smiled holding my spear tight.

"To think he would go that far… breaking the guest rights…. Where is the honor?" Ned muttered.

"So what do we do?" Jon inquired.

"We destroy him and his house," Ronard smirked at us, "I will make sure no one ever remembers house Frey after tomorrow,"

"Sounds delightful," I smirked.

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