Director’s Legend

"The winner of the Worst Director Award is... Shao Shuaijun! From "Night Watchman", first of all congratulations to Shao Shuaijun, he has become the youngest director to win the Worst Director Award in the history of our Golden Raspberry Awards. Shao, you take the worst Director, we are not entangled, what we are entangled with is that it should not be called 'Night Duty', it should be called 'Night Duty', and the name of Night Duty is terrible, don't you think?"

In the applause of everyone, Shao Shuaijun walked onto the stage with a look of displeasure, and the lights of the cinema went out, leaving only a flashlight shining on Shao Shuaijun's face.

"Wow, the night watchman is on stage, everyone applauds!"

Amid the applause, Shao Shuaijun took the shabby golden raspberry trophies handed over by two comedians. Looking left and right, they looked like discarded film boxes. The raspberries on top seemed to be about to fall off. Moreover, this trophy is different from ordinary trophies, it is very small, so small that the camera is not aligned, and you don't even know that you are still holding the trophy.

The flashlight was very dazzling, and Shao Shuaijun glared at him: "I'm not a night watchman, and I don't go out at night, please turn on the light. Otherwise, believe it or not, I'll immediately throw this broken box on the ground and crush it?"

When the lights were turned on, Shao Shuaijun nodded in satisfaction.

"Someone said it was called Night Duty just now, but I plan to call it Night Duty for the sequel."

"The Nightwatchman is so bad, is there a sequel?" Someone shouted from the audience.

Shao Shuaijun raised his eyelids: "No matter how bad you are, it won't be as bad as "Double-Faced Murder", five awards. Also, remember to close the doors and windows at night, and cover the mirror with cloth, otherwise you will wait for Gyllenshire." I went to chat with you. Alright. Let’s not talk nonsense. To be honest, I have directed seven works in my four-year career, and five of them were released in the United States. However, I have not won a formal director award. In China, in In the United States, in Cannes, in Berlin, in Venice, I was not even nominated. I never thought that the first international director award in my life would be the Golden Raspberry Award. Look, how much is this broken box made of? Yes. $5 is enough to buy a dozen. No wonder no celebrities are willing to participate, and the fare of a trip can’t make up for it, so you lose once every time you come!”

"Haha." The audience burst into laughter.

Shao Shuaijun continued to talk nonsense on the above: "Although it is a very shabby broken box, I still have to say my acceptance speech. Ahem. First of all, I am very grateful to the judges for awarding this award to me. I am excited, shocked, terrified, and uneasy. And, I have a deep urge to growl. Are you so disapproving of "Night Watchman"? All right, I brought a gift to every judge today."

talking. Shao Shuaijun yelled at his assistant Wang Cuicui in the audience: "Go and get the workers to move the goods. Each person will deliver one piece. No one can lose."

When everyone was at a loss, the workers who had been waiting for a long time opened the cargo box of the truck, took out stacks of "Night Watchman" DVDs, and then rushed into the movie theater and scattered them one by one.

Shao Shuaijun laughed loudly at the top: "Before when you nominated, you said that "Night Watchman" was a big bad movie, so bad that no one watched it. Well, I know there are 700 audiences sitting in the audience today, among you Half of them are judges. If you say no one has watched it, you must have never seen it. If you haven’t seen it, you can conclude that "Night Watchman" is not good. Wow, you ruined my directing career, I mean almost."

There were screams, applause and applause from below.

Shao Shuaijun continued: "So, I brought you all presents, a DVD of "Night Watchman" for each of you, oh, there are a few hardcover copies in it, and a DVD with a signed poster by Gyllenshire, that's an easter egg You must watch it carefully when you go back. Don’t just watch it and say it’s a bad movie. If you finish watching it, especially those who got the easter eggs, and think the movie is not bad after watching it, I will come here again. Return this broken box to you!"

Crash.

"Ha ha."

There was laughter in the cinema.

Shao Shuaijun was about to step down, when he suddenly remembered something: "I was a little sudden. I watched Halle Berry's acceptance speech for a long time at home. I really wish I could be so sincere and excited. But, as you can see, I No way, duch (thanks a lot)!"

Amid the applause, Shao Shuaijun finished the last sentence in an exaggerated and ironic tone, holding the award for worst director, and walked back to the audience with an embarrassing face. There will be an award for the best picture in a while, and he is likely to walk around on stage again.

However, after Shao Shuaijun, it was the turn of "Double Suspected Murder" to appear.

"Worst Actress went to...Lindsay Lohan from Double, it's incredible, this is already the sixth award. But I want to say, we are losing money by giving them so many awards Shaw only took one item and gave us a carload of DVDs, what did Chris give us? What did Lindsay give us? Bland, or a crazy movie?"

"The Worst On-Screen Partner is...Lindsay Lohan and Lindsay Lohan, from "Double Suspect", the seventh award, really crazy winning momentum. Oh, by the way, did you hear Wrong, did I just say two Lindsay Lohan or one? This question is full of unknowns. Even our judges watched the movie to the end, but they didn’t figure out whether Lindsay Lohan played one person or two. , or a pair of twins? Maybe we are as crazy as the director and screenwriter of this movie?"

"Worst Supporting Actor went to... Eddie Murphy from "Norbit"..."

"Worst Supporting Actress is... Eddie Murphy, from "Norbit"..."

"The one who won the worst actor is... Eddie Murphy, from "Norbit"..."

"Wow, this is even crazier than Lindsay Lohan. Do you know why the three awards have the same name? Obviously, the judges can't make mistakes. You have to ask Eddie .Murphy, why does he appear on the leading actor, supporting actor and supporting actress? Maybe this is his style, a woman for a while, a man for a while, and neither male nor female for a while..."

"Okay, happy times are always short, and it's the last award tonight. First, let's ask Shao, what's your mood now?"

When the camera turned around, Shao Shuaijun pretended to look at his watch impatiently: "I was thinking, how long will I have to listen to your nonsense..."

"It seems that Shao can't wait to win the prize."

"Okay, for the final ** part, the one that gets the worst picture is..."

Shao Shuaijun secretly prayed in his heart, he has already won the worst director, and don't take the worst film, otherwise, today is a completely tragic day.

The award presenters paused for a while, and then shouted: "Suspicious Killer, congratulations to Chris Severcent, he has won an unprecedented eight awards, and he is the biggest winner of the Golden Raspberry Award tonight! Haha, Shao, are you disappointed that you didn't win the prize?"

Shao Shuaijun also laughed loudly: "I want to say, I'm very sorry that "Nightman" didn't get this award. But I don't feel jealous at all. Really, I sincerely congratulate Chris Heversant Director, he is well-deserved, tonight's focus, congratulations!" (To be continued...)