Captive?

By the time I arrived back at the mansion night had fallen and I had developed a severe headache. It was probably because of the stress and guilt.

I dragged myself to the stairs and made my way to the fourth floor.

It was the sound of Athena's giggling.

I turned my head towards the direction of her room.

She must be playing with Zara.

I turned around but didn't move.

My head felt heavy while my chest felt hollow but still I wanted to see her.

I walked to her room and opened the door.

Her room was decorated with pink and white themed colors. Her cradle was there by the window and Zara was trying to put her to sleep with the lights off.

The baby lamp was on but it didn't have much effect since the curtains weren't drawn and the moonlight came streaming in pretty heavily.

"Sir?" Zara looked at me concerned, "Are you alright? You look pale."

"I'm fine. You can leave."

"Uh-What about Athena?"

"I'll take care of her. Leave, and make sure no one disturbs me for the rest of the night."

She nodded and got up. After giving one last glance to Athena who was sitting in her cradle looking at us, she left and closed the door behind her.

The room was now only illuminated by the full moon yet there was a lot of light.

"Dada!" Athena raised her arms up for me and I smiled.

"It's time for you to sleep yet you're so full of energy." I walked to her cradle and picked her up in my arms.

She jumped around in my embrace, "Uuu." She pointed towards the window.

"You want to go there?" I walked to the window and she pointed at the moon, "It sure is shining majestically." I looked at Athena, "The moon."

"Ooon!"

She was very fascinated by it but since she was a baby her attention span was short lived and she turned to look at other things.

Her gaze landed on my shirt and her next target were my silver chest buttons.

She pouted, making her chubby cheeks swell a bit more as she started grabbing and playing with them.

She was beyond adorable.

I can't believe I used to think I didn't want a blessing like this.

"Athena…" I felt my legs get weak, so I slumped down against the wall next to the window, "I'm so sorry Athena…"

She looked at my face and kept staring at me in confusion, "I'm so sorry…" She brought her hands to my cheeks to wipe them dry, "Uwaa rya?" Even though the act warmed me it didn't stop my vision from getting blurry again.

"I'm so sorry for ever not wanting you...:"

I held her tiny arms in my hands and gently brought them down from my face.

"I'm sorry for not being there from the start…" I sniffled, "I just-" Words got caught in my throat, "I- I don't even know how it all happened…"

"Da," She tried reaching for my face again.

Her small hands wanted to wipe away the pain but I was hurting so much I didn't think it would be enough.

"I can't even blame anyone because I'm the one at fault. I was afraid… So terrified of the things that can possibly happen to you and it's not a lie that I still am." She looked back at me with a slightly open mouth, "But I guess that fear is over weighed by my love for you."

Is it because she's my daughter that I've grown so attached to her in just a few days?

I enjoy watching her play, love it when she crawls into my arms, it feels less lonely eating with her but most importantly. I love it when she calls out to me, dada, her incomplete words have such a strong impact on me.

I lowered my head, "I'm sorry," I took a shaky breath, "Forgive me for only thinking that only bad things could happen…"

I looked at Athena and let go of her arms, "Forgive your father Athena. He's a fool…" The moonlight made her eyes shine like lapis while she stared at me with a troubled expression, "I never knew," I shook my head lightly, "That such a small person could ever bring me so much joy… I'm so sorr-y" I felt my throat get dry.

She grabbed my shirt and pulled herself closer to me to give me a hug. Since she couldn't stand, all she could do was hug my stomach.

And honestly, it felt really cozy.

I held her and brought her next to my chest, she wrapped her small arms around my neck and laid her head next to my chest, listening to my heart beat.

"I want to make it up to your mom… I love her beyond words. Do you think I can do it?"

"Un!"

I smiled softly.

"I just hope she hasn't moved on from me. What will I do then?" I glanced down at Athena.

What if someday she comes and takes you away?

I noticed that she had fallen asleep.

I hugged her, "If that happens, there will be nothing left of me."