Hayer had complicated feelings towards King Eswa.

He hated King Eswa, and he was pathetic. It was because Eswa Lepos fit that lousy expression of ‘incompetent tyrant’ perfectly.

At the same time, however, he also felt a guilt that could not be completely washed away by King Eswa. It’s not that big, but it’s engraved very small somewhere in his heart, so there were times when that tingling bothered him.

He was the son of his mother’s affair, and Eswa Lepos regarded Hayer as his son without knowing the fact.

Of course, he was not a loving father, and his favouritism towards his eldest son was obvious. Still, the fact that he deceived his father, who thought he was his own son, was the reason for the scars left on Hayer.

But the scars were small, and the hatred was much greater. Therefore, Hayer was delighted to see Iris, who revealed herself to be the legitimate descendant.

In the gaze of Eswa Lepos looking down at Iris, a strong murderous intention appeared. He looked like he wanted to strangle her at any moment.

Eswa Lepos opened his mouth.

“You are the legitimate line of descent. Yes, you should be.”

He expressed his jealousy of Iris, who is less than half his age, in his eyes and in his tone.

“Good for you. It’s envious. Yes, Ardi Lepos’s… if there is a promise from the Lepos family, you should keep it.”

He spoke sarcastically. Iris was just observing his un-adult-like attitude.

King Eswa avoided answering for a while to take Cadella, even though he knew he had no justification. Iris stood and waited for King Eswa to return from evading.

She did not back down, and he could not think of any cause, so King Eswa said reluctantly.

“Take the traitor.”

“Yes. Thank you, Your Majesty.”

Iris even wanted to get him as a meritorious subject, but she was satisfied for now that Cadella was released safely.

As soon as she bid farewell and left the office, she told Hayer.

“I’m picking up Cadella.”

“There is no need to be in such a hurry.”

Hayer spoke leisurely, but Iris could not afford to.

The two immediately entered the dungeon and brought Cadella out.

Hayer said as he left the dungeon, holding the squalid Cadella in one arm.

“Now you’re legally free.”

“Am I a free man now? Really?”

Cadella asked again as if he couldn’t believe it, then asked while looking at Iris.

“Then what should I do freely from now on?”

“Well. What do you want to do?”

“Captain, please decide for me!”

“I’m not a captain outside the maze. You have to decide.”

“Really? Hmm…”

Cadella pondered and opened his mouth.

“First, I want to wash up and eat a lot of delicious food!”

“It’s nice that what you want is simple.”

Hayer said, and left Cadella to Hencke, the vice-captain who was waiting outside with a bright expression.

“Take him to my house and feed him to his heart’s content.”

“Yes, Captain. Let’s go, Cadella.”

“Hencke, I want meat!”

“What meat? Just say it.”

“Hmm… any meat!”

Cadella, who didn’t know exactly what kind of meat was in the world, blindly shouted meat and followed Hencke.

Iris staggered from her spot, exhausted as soon as Cadella was out of sight. Surprised, Hayer quickly grabbed her arm.

Iris’s tense arm trembled. Hayer immediately held her. Iris couldn’t refuse because she didn’t have the strength to walk any more, so she put her arm around Hayer’s neck and said.

“Aren’t I pathetic?”

“No. You are brave.”

He answered firmly, and took Iris to the east building.

He set Iris down on the bed in her room. Then he seemed about to leave, but after much consideration, he dragged a chair and returned to her side.

Iris asked.

“Do you have something to say?”

“I have a question.”

Iris nodded when Hayer spoke.

“What is it?”

Because she had been locked in this room for a week, the two had not been able to see each other.

It was a wonder why a week was such a long time, but it was not a very short time because they were together every day and then separated.

Hayer took too long, and Iris eventually urged him.

“What’s the question?”

“Iris.”

“Huh?”

Hayer sat with his arms crossed, leaned back in his chair, and opened his mouth.

“Since I put Cadella in a safe place for now, I’m asking this question because I can afford to…”

Iris tilted her head at his words, and Hayer continued.

“Do you remember what you asked?”

“Which…?”

Iris’s eyes widened after asking back.

“Now, if you could do whatever you want… if I let you… what are you going to do?”

Recalling the provocation she had made, she quickly sat up on the bed.

Hayer opened his mouth, facing Iris.

“Now that it came to you, what kind of question is that?”

“What—what?”

“If you allow me to do what I want to do, of course I will.”

“……”

Blinking in embarrassment, Iris asked carefully.

“…What do you want to do?”

“If you won’t let me, don’t ask.”

“I’ll let you.”

Hayer seemed to be talking provokingly, so she didn’t want to lose and said that without thinking.

Shortly thereafter, Hayer stood up when Iris was about to take back what she had just said.

“Then I’ll take it as permission.”

“Permission…”

Hayer’s lips touched Iris’s as she was about to say she won’t do it and cancel it.

He seemed to be fully aware that he had surprised her, and so he seemed to be waiting for her reaction for a moment while their lips were touching.

Still, after Iris didn’t move for a while, he slowly parted his lips, then hers as well, and began to kiss her a little more intensely.

It wasn’t the kind of kiss that touched the corner of the mouth like last time. Iris forgot to push him away, and was hurriedly clutching Hayer’s arms with both hands.

On a quiet moonlit night, the sound of friction was heard.

‘Is kissing supposed to be such a stimulating thing?’

Iris felt as if the heat from her lips was winding around her fingertips and spreading all over her body. The smell of cologne from him was pleasant, and the sensation of his rough fingertips was cool and strange.

The kiss, it was dizzyingly good. And it was much longer than expected.

Hayer’s lips, which she kissed until she felt like her lips were swollen, fell away. Iris saw a red stain on his lips that had been applied from hers.

“……”

But just staring at it, she had no intention of wiping it off. As it is, she wanted her traces to be engraved on him.

Is kissing supposed to be like this?

Is it like a key to the desire to possess that has been suppressed?

Iris became afraid of not being able to handle her own fluttering heart just from being kissed, but Hayer seemed unable to even think of such complicated thoughts.

He grabbed Iris’s thigh with one hand, pulled her towards him, and whispered softly in her ear.

“How far will you go? Permission.”

“Um…”

“There is a lot I want to do.”

He seemed to be trying to make a joke. However, it didn’t sound like a joke at all, perhaps because he had to share his attention to suppressing his body’s excitement.

Iris thought a kiss was enough, but she didn’t want to get away from him either.

The married life before the North Gate… was really terrible. Solely to give birth to an heir. It was a time where Iris and Sid had no need to proceed without that reason.

It was just painful and suffocating, but she had no choice but to do it because it was something she had to do. But, strangely, this man seemed to be hoping for it.

Why?

Why do you want that pain and suffocation?

Is it because you like being touched like this?

After much consideration, Iris opened her mouth.

“Try it.”

I’ll endure it.

That’s what Iris thought. She decided to leave it up to him if he wanted to.

As soon as the words fell from Iris, Hayer picked her up and sat down on the bed, placing Iris on his lap. Then he first took off the stockings she was wearing.

Iris felt the strangeness of her clothes being dragged down by his hand. She recalled her old memories and covered her chest with her arms as if she were defending herself. Then Hayer asked, bewildered by the action.

“You don’t want me to see?”

“What are you going to do when you see it?”

“Don’t even touch?”

“Yes. I don’t like it.”

Feeling hurt and bad. She’s experienced everything.

When Iris refused so firmly, Hayer immediately gave up and nodded.

“Sorry, I won’t if you don’t like it. Fortunately, there are many places I like even if it’s not the chest.”

“What do you like…”

Iris’s eyes widened.

“Are you crazy?”

Hayer replied to those round eyes.

“I’m not crazy.”

afterword 

genuinely felt so many butterflies this chapter EEEEK kicking the sheets rolling around in bed look at how far my babies have come

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